get a divorce

Tonight was a doozy. Wife demanded I choose a place for us all to eat dinner, but I said whatever she wants was fine. She started to get more and more frustrated that I wouldn’t decide for her, and she started to freak out in front of our kids. I overheard her calling her mom to complain about how mean I was being; how I wasn’t taking care of our kids.

Finally I took my son and daughter into a pizza place in SoHo, and she walked out on us, taking the keys to our studio apt. with her. Suddenly the depression I was feeling all evening lifted and the kids and I had a great time. My son (5 years old) behaved very well, my daughter (2) ate well. My son, bless his heart, talked about how mommy yells all the time and doesn’t like me. He said he likes being with me more. I could handle being a single father. I can’t take anymore of being a married one.

On a vacation with wife and my two young kids. She keeps observing how irritable I am. Every moment I am with her is torture. I finally said to her, what she’s seeing is aresult of not being able to stand being around her. I lose all spring in my step; it’s like I’m walking in molasses. I said I want a divorce. Her reaction was to not speak to me for an hour, after which she pretended nothing had happened. She clearly thinks I’m not serious. As if this is just acting out. I don’t love her. My eyes are always elsewhere. She asks how I can be so mean to her. Isn’t the answer obvious?

I want to get a divorce. My marriage is going nowhere. I have great kids, and they see us fight way too much.