I haven’t felt like posting for a while. I haven’t felt like keeping tabs on myself, trying to “get it right”, coaxing or bribing or bullying myself to do things. And I’ve been kinda avoiding 43T because I felt a bit of a fraud being here when I wasn’t really working on anything on my list.
I feel fine, not at all down or discouraged or even particularly unmotivated; if anything I’m actually doing a bit better with some of my goals than I usually do when I am posting about them, but it’s in a very natural, unforced kinda way – when it happens it’s great, and when it doesn’t happen, that’s ok too. Maybe it’s the time of year, a kind of slowing down and drawing in. I’m certainly feeling the hibernating impulse – I’m really enjoying getting home each evening, drawing the curtains to shut the world out, and curling up with a blanket and a book.
So I’m giving myself permission to take a break and just coast for a while. I’ll still be here, enjoying the posts and company of my friends, but I’m not going to beat myself up over not doing anything particular myself. I trust my get-up-and-go to come back when the time is right.
