get over my ex

he rang me yesterday … I got so angry … he told me he was ringing to let me know there had been a glitch on some paperwork we are trying to sort out … started telling me I was stupid and I just hung up on him … nothing has changed :-( am so upset …

.. wasn’t expecting it so picked up … he just wanted to know how things were going and how I was doing. Told him I was just fine and did not want us to keep in touch …

and I haven’t cracked … maybe this time it will be ok … keep telling myself he doesn’t deserve me and I certainly deserve better …

have not contacted my ex today … slowly but surely I will get there … it is hard but I know that long term it is for the best …

.... and about to set a record for being the person most ignored by someone …. I just don’t seem to get it: HE DOES NOT WANT TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH ME!

am trying not to contact him … which is very difficult :-( I really need to be strong and stick it out … otherwise nothing will ever change and it has been years of this already …

Well, I seem to make no progress at all … it is one step forward and a thousand back … I have to be strong … have to stop seeing him and contacting him … but can’t seem to manage and all that happens is that he uses me .. and I feel terrible …

have totally failed … gave into temptation and contacted him .. he of course is ignoring me except for the odd answer which is enough to keep me hooked … I am so in love with him that I put up with all this crap … but I know I need to move on or else nothing will change .. time is passing by and we are not getting any younger and I know that I will regret putting all my energy into a guy that doesn’t want me …

I hope I can resist … would love to talk to him. Miss hearing his voice, even miss the arguing … hope he will call me but I know he won’t …

and so far it is working … he will never contact me so I just have to make sure I resist temptation … easier said than done but so far, so good.