stand up for me

he started talking about this girl who was supposedly trying to pick him up… i cut him off with…

me: why are you telling me this

him: what do you mean?

me: why are you telling me… maybe you should tell someone else..

him: does it make you feel uncomfortable? if you don’t want to hear it, just say so…

me: i don’t want to hear it

him: why?

me: cos i don’t want to hear it

...silence… then he keeps talking about other bullshit… what a prick!!!

but i did it, i cut all (direct) ties… its gonna a long hard road, but it will only make me a better person… right? it better!

lastnight was hard, i cried so much, half the time i wasn’t even sure why i was crying anymore

i prayed the rosary on my own, i can honestly say i’ve never done that before… i didn’t pray to be okay, i didn’t pray for inner peace, i didn’t pray for him to call me back, i didn’t even pray for me to stop hurting

i only prayed for one thing… for the Lord or Mary to just let me sleep… nothing else but just sleep… after hours of praying and crying… nothing :/

i need to do this, he is no good for me… he makes me happy temporarily, but he does more bad than good… i need to let this go…

i wish i was leaving sooner… it would make all of this seem so much easier