This year went by faster than I expected. And I guess I could say that my life is, if not totally, a LOT different:
Living 1,000 miles from home
Getting rid of boyfriend
Getting enough sleep on a regular basis (this did wonders for my mood and anxiety issues)
Coming out to myself (this helped too!)
Coming out to a few other people
Still no job, no car, and very little idea of what I want to do with my life, though.
Overall? I think I’m doing better :)
I’m in college now! My major (thus far) is chemical engineering, and I’m really enjoying my classes (the studying, not so much). My roommates are really cool, my room is nice, and I couldn’t ask for anything better…except for weather, haha.
The food here is amazing and really healthy, and it’s amazingly easy to head to the gym for an hour and work out for an hour. I’m actually eating a lot better here than I was at home. I’m excited to see how this helps me with my weight loss goals.
The reason I go to the gym to work out instead of to fencing practice is…well, I’d heard the fencing club here described as “very casual”...it’s more “theoretical.” Perhaps next semester I can put more time and effort into getting it together, but right now I’m really into powderpuff football, which I picked up solely because of their advertising message of “Join us! Hit people! It’s fun!” And it really is.
The boyfriend (J) and I split when I left for school in mid-August. I think it was hard for him at first, but recently we’ve had a friendly (non-flirty) conversation over Facebook, and I think he’s a much better friend than boyfriend.
Speaking of flirting…
I’ve met a girl. That’s really all there is to it right now. We’ll see :)
We’ve become kind of distant, especially recently. When we Skype, we talk about the same things every time, just for the sake of talking. And while you’ve always treated me very well, it sometimes concerns me how you treat other people. To be honest, I’m not feeling the relationship anymore. I’d hoped it was just a phase that I would get over and everything would be good again, but it’s not. I don’t want to cause you pain, but I have to do what’s best for me. I think we should break up.
I haven’t done this yet.
Reason: he’s across the country until early May.
Is it better to send it now (and be “that girl” that breaks up by email/text) because I’m now fully aware I don’t have feelings for him anymore? Is it somehow kinder to pretend everything’s okay until he gets back? Should I wait until August, when we both leave for college and we won’t see each other for months afterward, to spare the awkwardness?
I hate that this sounds like an “Ask Amy” column, but I’ve never dumped anyone before.
It’s two weeks before spring break of my senior year of high school. I’m in a long-distance relationship that isn’t going anywhere since I haven’t seen him since January (although we do Skype when we can.) I have a job that I love but I only work a few hours a week. I don’t own a car and I’m dependent on my parents for a LOT of things. And I don’t even know where I want to go to college, let alone what I want to do with my life.
PS. And I’m a little awkward around people and I’m WAY too hard on myself.