write a thank you entry to everyone who has made a difference in my life (read, or unread, it doesn't matter)

Thank you so, SO much for the past 10 months of support, cheerleading and grounding advice. I wish I wasn’t too awkward to write this to you for real, because you have been such a wonderful teacher and I really look up to and respect you! I can’t even explain how crappy the guidance I’ve received in the past has been, since it has either been non-existant or otherwise not at all helpful. Some of this is due to the fact that I prefer to be independent and solve problems on my own, but each week at my outfit critiques you always found something constructive to say and I really do appreciate that! You have this amazingly calm and collected demeanor and it’s something that extends away from yourself, and it helped to calm me down and collect my own thoughts. I can’t thank you enough for all the help you’ve given me, I know it was your job, but you’ve gone above and beyond while at the same time doing your Masters and I’m sure a million other things, and that’s something really special. You’re a wonderful teacher, and our program needs more of that. I hope the faculty offers you a permanent place.

I am actually starting to come out of my little bubble this year and am finding the air to be wonderfully fresh and inviting. I never really realized how lovely everyone in our year is until now, after having no choice but to step out from behind my (now dissolved) little circle of acquaintances from first year. I truly enjoy being at school and hanging out and sharing in the wealth of knowledge and ideas that everyone has. Thank you for embracing my strangeness (though, I suppose we’re all a little strange, we have to be to stay sane) and inviting me in with smiles and warmth!

xo

Thank you guys for being my never ending support, and whining with me about missing home while we were in Africa.

I’m really sad that things changed, and you two seem to be a little…frustrated with one another’s lifestyles now that we’re not all bare-faced, grimy and happy about it.

I love you two so, so much. I’m glad we’ve stayed in touch, but it would have been nice to hang out, just the three of us. But, that’s the way it goes, I guess.

Thank you both for having Gaelen and I, and trying to entertain us in your boring town.

Thank you for always being an inspiration. It was fun being friends, but we’ve drifted apart and I’ve come to terms with it now, and I don’t mind so much. I can’t help you if you don’t want help, and I hope you’re doing okay. Thank you for teaching me generosity and appreciation. And for all the great music, and letting me borrow your clothes.

Thanks for being my longest friend. I can never seem to push you away, like I tend to do everyone else and you are someone I can count on. You are family. You are always happy for me, no matter what and I promise to always be the same for you. I am so thankful to have someone like you in my life, because no matter how much we drift we can always get together (even after months of not really speaking) and it will always be the same.

Thank you for being my gym buddy. You are probably the only reason I actually make it there, and have some sort of human contact throughout the week. I sincerely enjoy our talks, and it’s really great that you push me to finish our cardio because if I was by myself, I would quit in a flash.

Also, thanks for reminding me to put things into perspective, and letting me be a stupid girl with you!

Thank you for being stable, a constant in my life. Thank you for all of our talks, and for being able to hold up an intelligent conversation. Thank you for wanting to spend time with me, and then doing so. Thanks for being my partner in countless school projects. For all the silly fun we had in Grades 5 and 6. For knowing a lot of things I don’t, and taking the time to explain them. Thank you for inviting me to your cottage, even though I couldn’t come this year. Thank you for understanding when I need space, and letting me have it.

Thanks for being a friend.

Thank you for giving me the freedom to make mistakes and thank you for letting me redeem myself. Thank you for trusting me to take care of myself, and for always being there even when I forget. Thank you for never ever wanting to take the spotlight away from me, thank you for recognizing my strengths and helping me to understand and improve my weaknesses. Thank you for never spoiling me, even though I’m your only child. Thank you for teaching me how to be humble, kind, caring, modest and proud of myself. Thank you for your patience. Thank you for believing in me most of the time. And thank you for always taking the time to listen.

Thank for you all the encouraging comments. I don’t always reply to them, because I don’t really know what to say, but I just would like you to know that I read them and they always make my day better. Thank you for taking the time to read my entries. These days, I feel very…lonely and without community, and it’s so common, and now something I am longing for, it’s nice have a connection. You are very intelligent, and I thank you for your wisdom and life experiences.

Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for keeping me stable, for always returning my phone calls, for calming me down when I’m freaking out for stupid reasons. Thank you for teaching me how to live in the now and not in the future, for teaching me to take more risks, and for helping me let go and have fun. For letting me know that I can trust you. For trusting me. Thank you for knowing all the right things to do or say and for making me smile when I am sad. Thank you for countless beautiful moments. Thank you for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Thank you for sneakouts and adventures. Thank you for helping me rebuild my self-confidence, self-esteem and self-assurance, even though you may not realize it. Thank you for all the small things, and thank you for all the big things.

Mostly, thank you for loving me no matter what. And thank you for letting me love you.