be self-confident again

that would prove i have confidence …. i know i’m funny it just seems scary with hundreds of people focusing on you … Jeff thinks i need to drink to be funny but that wouldn’t really work … I do feel comfortable with people i know i just have to figure out how to focus on 1 or 2 friendly faces. I guess it something i should have already tried.

the more confident i become. I wish I could find a job that i would like or had the money go back to school.
Making new friends is helping me. It’s strange I really didn’t think I would want a friend 10 years younger than me but Eric really is a good friend. He came to my grandmother’s funeral.

Hopefully I lost some weight. I see the doctor next week so I'll definitely now then. I think the scales there are more accurate then the 1 at home.

finding out the mystery shopping was a scam I should have known but i guess i just really wanted something to work out. I’m trying not to let it get me down too much.

It’s good money and it doesn’t seem to hard . This seems more legitimate than last time i looked into it.

not as much as i wanted but still the weight will come and i’ll start to regain my confidence

The problem was i would let what some people said effect me too much. Certain people will try and hurt me no matter what so i can’t let what they said effect me.

Walking should be able to resume next week so the weight will start dropping. I will buy a bus pass for a month. i just have to figure out where i can buy it . how much it is and what month. I know i have to put myself out there more but I’m only going so much to start with.

I felt really good last year walking and i took off a bunch of weight not as much as the year before but i’m going to try and do more starting in the Spring.

it’s a slow process and i’m not sure when will be done or what i need to do to say i have it again

I don’t know which 1 will restore my confidence though