List goals that never made it

expend my vocabulary

see a space shuttle lunch

get a bazilian wax

have no egrets

live on a dessert island

improve my pasture

adapt a child

organise my fiances

learn ancient geek

truss myself

pierce my cerebellum

have a totally different wife by this time next year

(There is one involving ‘developing multiple streams of passive income’ that I can’t possibly print here).

learn to smile at stranglers

practice paranoia

join the peace corpse

learn how to waterboard

lock people in the eye

practice chai tea

that never made it off the starting blocks:

Support the millinery in Iraq

Take a dance class with my significant otter

Organise my flies

(I’m sure you can think of others).