stay sober

I made it to one year, which I celebrated Sunday, December 2nd. It is a very scary time because as well as I have been doing, one day at at time, two friends who came into the program a couple months before i did have both relapsed. The anniversary also reminds me of where i was a year ago, a really terrible place!!! The scary part is that i feel I have so much more to loose if I should find myself in a relapse. A few days is not as hard to accumulate as a whole year. I guess it is time I just keep focusing on making it through each 24 hours. I cut down, then finally quit smoking (again) on November 18th. The cravings have been hideous. I will be focusing on each 24 hours and then will be thinking about recommitting to watching my diet and eating healthier. So many things I want to work on, but the progress is slow. I am learning to work on smaller, more achievable goals, which is so counter intuitive to my “all or nothing” personality, lol.