overcome depression and loneliness

How alone do you figure a mom with a baby can be? Yet its a crazy kind of loneliness. You are never alone but are terribly lonely. I love my son and adore doing things with him. But at the end of the day I am in low spirits. I miss intelligent adult company. I miss being part of an organization and a peer group and doing something with my team. I miss the crazy deadlines and the sense of achievement when you’re done. I miss the long convuluted conversations and leisurely lunches, the monosylabic grunts while mainlining cafeine before d day … the everyday trivia and people that were a part of my life before. Most of all I miss the intellectual challenge and fulfillment…

I feel so unloved sometimes. None of the men in my life, my father, brothers or husband have been there for me when I needed them. No one has really cared for me or my dreams. No one has understood or taken the time to try. None of the women in my life… my mother mainly, have supported me. Its been an uphill struggle and a lonely one.

I’ve always felt like a stranger in my own house.

Depression and loneliness are universal. We all get sad. We are all alone. And we know we should not let that get us down. But its hard. Its a constant struggle, an ongoing process.