Create & live in my own REALITY!!

The best book i’ve read this year that totally relates to this goal is “ask and it is given – Abraham Hicks” where ‘the secret’ was inspired from.

It took me less than a week to finish it, think about it and to grasp the concept of “Reality”. I have recommended to friends and siblings to read, and the feedback has been excellent. Ever since i’ve read this book, i have come across numerous ‘other’ books based loosely on this same concept, but in my opinion not well laid out, and too basic.

I have been constantly putting this into practice, making it a habit and to always be self awareness of surroundings.

There is a lady that works at my company, she’s got heavily facial hair, i haven’t seen her in a while but alot of people dont’ really like her. Not because she’s got a goatee and a moustache but because she’s a hard person to get along with, everything has to be her way, always cranky, therefore her facial hair stands out tenfold. It doesn’t really help her in getting to know people if she treats others like that, i think it’ll just make it worst.

I’m aware that not everyone is ‘good looking’ ‘beautiful/handsome’ but the least they can do is have their personality shine through with kindness and good heart, otherwise they’ll just become ‘a mean person that isn’t so nice looking’.

eg. shrek, though he’s ugly, but he’s got a good personality and kind towards others hence the donkey follows him around, in the end no one sees Shrek as ugly.

This is the same with the opposite as well, eg. Beauty and the Beast. The start of the story when the old lady asks if she could stay overnight and give him the rose, he selfishly denied and turned her away. This is a guy that is a prince, rich, handsome lives in a big castle and has servants to help him, except one flaw. He’s not a nice person, a spoil brat with no moral care for anyone except himself.. Though he’s got everything from the outside he’ hasn’t got what it takes to be someone on the inside.

The point i’m trying to make is the combination that we’ve been assigned with or by natures way choosen, of whether we’re:

combo 1. not-so-good-looking x mean-selfish-deceitful
combo 2. not-so-good-looking x kind-hearted-gentleness

combo 3. good-looking x mean-selfish-deceitful
combo 4. good-looking x kind-hearted-gentleness.

‘Don’t judge a book by it’s cover’ as the famous saying goes, this is true because when you see someone for the first time and lets assume that they’re not-good-looking, you’ll either a. ignore and disregard or b. make the effort and be friends.
When you choose a. it is end of story and you move on, but always thinking in your mind that this person is ugly. For the ones that don’t follow the rules but continue on making friends with them anyways will find out later on that the person isn’t so bad, the ugliness initially won’t ever be an issued ever again. Can you imagine having the worst combo, the person being ugly and as you try to be their friends, but finding out that they’re mean, unkind and treats everyone bad as if ‘the world’ owes them something’, you’ll not only see their outside ugliness but also see the true personality_, this is a lose/lose situation for them.

Moral and point of post:

Regardless of whether you think your ugly or beautiful be nice to people so they won’t use it against you. Nothing worst than being ugly and having people dislike you for your personality.
And the same goes for being beautiful but having a bad personality that people just don’t like. She can be a supermodel but with a heart of stone she’s no different than Medusa. eg. Shallow Hal.

One of my closest friends is a Cook Islander, naturally she’s larger in size and people tend to make fun of her. She wasn’t a person of looks because of her size but she had a great personality of which you’d want a friend to have. She was heaps fun to hang out with, people don’t see it this way though, all they see is her size.

My two little dogs, the first time they were brought home i thought one was cuter than the other. The ugly one looked skinny in the face, and didn’t seem happy most of the time whereas the other one was always playing around seeking attention. Over time i’ve grown more fond of the ugly one, i find her to be more cuter than the actual cute one. My friends would comment that one is cute and the other ugly, they just don’t know it yet which has more dogsonality.

(I hope this isn’t confusing for anyone that reads it)

There are two kinds of views each individual has, the pessimistic view and the opptomistic view. As the old classic saying ‘Glass half empty, or Glass half full’, one is the pessimistic and the other opptomistic.

When you go through life intent on only focusing on one view, you’ll soon later realize it’s not doing you any good. In any situation and events, we as humans still has a choice to always assume the worst or have hope for the best. I know some people might say ‘hoping always doesn’t determine the results’,.
Yes, I agree wit this statement, but the chance of hoping for the best and assuming the worst, is 50-50.

Lets say for instance your waiting for a love one to return home from somewhere, it’s pass the hour that they should have come home. You begin to get worried, you start to play scenarios of all the things that might have happen to them, you lose your focus, your concentrating your energy into something that might or might not even be true. Worrying is a good thing if used seldomly, otherwise you’ll be consumed by it.

Now that you’ve created this thought of a bad thing happening to them, you’ll start to believe it to be true. All you’ve done is turned something that ‘there might be a good reasons to why there late’ to ‘i know there late because this happened to them’. I know this might sound ridiculous but there are people with this kind of worry. For instance some of my friends i have, they worry too much of something they can’t change.

Now back to the pre thought of the pessimistic view, you’ve realize it’s pass the hour, so now your at the cross roads, the Pes road, or the Opp road. Instead of worrying about what might happen, just think of it that theres a reasonable excuse that they’re late. The reasons might be an as simple as, ‘there was a block on the road, had to de-tour’ or ‘had to worklate couldn’t get out of office in time’ or simply ‘rush hour’.

I know you might think, ‘ok!, but isn’t that looking at it pessimistically as well’ In a sense yes, but the point is your not thinking of something harmful, reaching the point of paronoia. Have you heard of this saying, “You worry too much”, “You worried me to death”, “Don’t worry, be happy”, “No news, is good news”.

Everytime my brother goes out late, my parents begin to worry, my mum especially. She assumes my brother is with the bad crowd, doing drugs, getting into fights, hanging out on the streets.. etc etc.. As for me, as i have trust in my brother i don’t assume anything bad has happened to them. Now, tell me whats the difference instead of thinking about all those above scenarios than the ones of ‘he’s at a friends house watching movies’ and that he’ll be back soon. Worrying manifests inself into something bigger than it should be accredited for.

There are so many people that complain about their jobs, how low they’re being paid, how the management is treating them badly, there is no hope of them seeing something good in their works. This view has made it to become fixed in their mental conscious side of the mind. When you tell them, why not change jobs? they’ll reply with the same answers,. ‘Can’t afford to change’ ‘I can’t do anything else, i’m in my comfort zone’ ‘i’m too old to do anything else’ etc etc.. they’ve just answered a pessimistic view with a pessimistic outlook.

When you go to a restaurant, what is your reaction when you see that the food isn’t as nice as you had hope, not enough dressings, not enough meats on the spaghetti, etc etc.. you’ll instantly think that this place isn’t good, you’ll immediately tell your friends, and everyone knows ‘word of mouth is the best advertisement for good or bad’. The opptomistic person would continue eating, disregarding the lack of a few things, and they’ll still continue to frequent this place. The simple fact that it just be a new chef is hired, nothing to do with the restaurant, even though management has to be really strict with these type of issues. My point is that if something is trival, why let it spoil your mood or use it as the main quality of the whole restaurant.

As the example of a question i’ve posted about seeing a door half open, what is your reaction of it? Something bad happen or the owner just simply forgot to close it.

Which one would you choose today?

Reading it carefully it’s not so difficult to accomplished. I’ve learnt to realize we make our own realities, even though it’s true we’re all conected in one way or another. I really believe the choices we make, and how we live determines our wellbeing. Its very simple enough on paper but putting it into action requires more than just contemplation. As a quote from Bruce Lee ‘Knowing is not enough we must do, willinging is not enough, we must apply’, very self-explanatory.

Every single individual is living in their own realities or least they create one. Everyone we meet, has their own ideas, ideologies, and their personal views of the world. All these ideas create an invisible web, each one unique yet can be interwoven as a whole.

Each morning before you wake up, you have the simplest of choice. A person either gets ready for work or sleep in. Whichever choice you make will have it’s own pathway. Let me explain how we interconnect with others, firstly the choice to ‘stay in’ gives the following. This results in your workplace requiring a temporary replacement, and in doing so gives another person the opportunity to also make a choice, ‘come in’ or ‘reject’, again another choice to be made. As i mention, even the simplest of choices has an effect on others, regardless whether it’s good or bad.

There’s a fine line between fact and fiction, if enough people believe in the ‘lie’ it will become ‘fact’. It goes the same for the other way round, a fact can easily be swayed to become a lie if enough people goes against it. This powerful tool is called the media, and this covers all areas of news.

The Four Agreements of the Toltec teachings:

BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST. Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are tired as opposed to well-rested. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.