find love. real love --- ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without each other love!

i found it 2 months ago.
i was totally in love.
it ended up messy & I got my heart broken, sorry to be a downer.
but i still say, it is far better to have loved & have lost than to never have loved at all. being in love was such an enriching, incredible experience, & I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I encourage everyone to keep believing in, & striving for love. it is out there & it is the most beautiful thing you will ever feel. good luck to everyone!

Im scared. I dont know whether to check this or not. He loves me & i love him, there’s no doubt about it. I love him so much. but I don’t know if I’m in love with him. It scares me because he says he’s in love with me…I want to be in love with him back, i really do. but i dont want to lie to myself, or him. they say when you’re in love, you’ll just KNOW. But I don’t just know. does that mean I’m not? I dont know why im saying all this it just hit me last night I got all paranoid & it’s been bothering me ever since. Maybe he only likes/loves me cause I’m hot/attractive/beautiful or whatever. He always calls me beautiful. does he mean it? yes, but what scares me is why does he say it? is he just after me for my looks? but i really don’t think he is, & i don’t want to believe he is, because he’s best friends with my two best guy friends, they’re like brothers to me… they’d protect me if he was just using me… right?
why do i have all of these doubts? i thought this was supposed to be easy…
maybe we’re moving too fast. maybe it’s just intimidating because this has never happened to me before. our relationship seems to progress in jumps. first he asked me out, then he held my hand, then he told me he loved me, then he kissed me….we’ve been going out for 3 weeks. is that too fast or is it just fast for me cause I’ve never had a serious relationship before & now i am?
i love him so so so much.
i think im just afraid to be in love with him, because no one has ever had this effect on me. I don’t ever want to lose it.
but at the same time, i’m afraid to not be in love with him…