keep in touch with friends

Although I still have a bit of phone anxiety, I have made lots of tea, lunch and dinner dates over the last few months, most of them by email or text message. This week I’ve got lots of things planned: I had a dinner date today, tomorrow I’ve got a tea date and another friend coming over in the evening, and on Sunday I’ve got plans with another friend. Two of these appointments were initiated by me, two by others. Good score so far :)

I sent out two emails to friends to set a date to get together for a cup of tea. Friend 1 already emailed back and we set a date.

Also I asked my sister to go to a musical with me, and she really liked the plan, so we immediately got tickets.

Today I chatted on MSN with a friend that I don’t see often at all. Usually our gettogethers get initiated by her, but this time at the end of the conversation I suggested that we make some plans to see each other again soon. We haven’t actually picked a date yet, but we will soon, and I’m glad I didn’t wait for her to suggest something this time :)

I added this goal because I need to “practise” keeping in touch with my friends and filling my social calendar on my own. For the past 10 years I have completely depended on the choir I’m in, which means that I get to see probably 85% of my friends automatically once a week. But I will be quitting the choir this year or the next, so I need to be able to stay in touch with them on my own. And there’s also the other 15% that are in danger of drifting away.

The problem is that I’m a bit scared of taking the initiative to call or mail people. I guess I’m scared of rejection, even by my closest friends. So I’m going to practise this, because I need the reassurance of knowing I can do this by myself, before I quit the choir. Kind of like a safety net.

First success: today I asked a friend (in person) if he would like to go to the theater with me, and he was enthusiastic and we immediately set a date!

I don’t know what subgoals I’ll set yet, but for now this entry will do.