choose one bad thing everyday to find the positive side of

Negative: Today is my last day at the office.

Positive: Today is my last day at the office. :)

Also—S got another paper route (it needs done every Friday afternoon is all :) It pays $100 once a week. An extra $400 a month will help incredibly, and not to mention a weekly paycheck will be amazing. :) YAY!! That helps my outlook a lot!

And because S let me sleep all night and not go on the route this morning, I am feeling a lot better. I think my cold or flu or whatever it was is finally starting to go away. :)

Negative: I was sicker then a dog all day. It was not fun in the least.

Positive: When I walked in the door after work, S had dinner all made for us, and we went to bed early, and she had her sister go with her on the route that night so I got to sleep all the way through the night to help me feel better!! :)

Negative: I was looking so forward to going home after the office today, snuggling up with S and watching a few episodes of Prision Break and falling asleep early because I’m discustingly exhausted (walking zombie isn’t a good look for me… take my word for it).

Positive: It’s only a few hours of work, and it’s more money to cover those bills I can’t cover otherwise…

Negative: I have to work tonight. And the biggest thing, I’m wondering how much I’m going to be able to get on 43T and really post as much as I like posting after Friday… :( I’ll do my best though.

Positive: I have my job back at the pizza place—starting tonight :( but it’s money. Friday is my last day at the office. And it’s VOTING DAY!!! Let’s get the dumb ass out of office!!!!!! :-)

YAY OBAMA/BIDEN!!!

_{Be fair warned—as I have said before… I’m fleeing the country ASAP if McCain/Palin is elected…}

Negative/Positive: Not sure which one it’s more of…

I’m being asked to find another job.

Negative: Cramping major today on top of my already messed up stomach. :(

Positive: Otherwise it’s been a pretty good day! S had an interview this morning, I had no cavities at the dentist today and I got an appt. for tomorrow afternoon to take a look at my stomach… hopefully we’ll figure out what the problem is and be able to start fixing it…

Negative: S didn’t take the news about the programs so well. Long story, but she’s going to look into them, but promises can’t be made (I don’t feel like explaining why—just the program wise, promises can’t be made). Anyways, she felt my mom (and I) stepped out of line by looking into this program. That it humiliated her and hurt her feelings that we ‘went behind her back’ and made calls and stuff about the prog.

Positive: I can understand where she’s coming from, but at the same time it makes me sad because we were just trying to help. I know my mom steps out of line a lot, and gets into peoples business too much, and I guess maybe I got too excited about something I hadn’t talked to her about first, but the fact was it hurt me that it hurt her. I was excited to find something I thought she didn’t know about. My mom was too! (afterall, she was who found it… well, me and her wise).

The point is, I don’t mind helping her, I don’t mind having to work my booty off to the point I can’t work anymore to take care of both of us, but if she’s gonna let me help take care of her, why can’t she accept someone else bigger then us to help her (and me!). I understand why she wasn’t accepted before, and why she wouldn’t be accepted again, but if she can possibly get accepted now, she could take care of the 13 week program, so she could start paying the court fees, so she could get her license, and start moving forward to get this closer to when the charge will be dropped off her record. Which all of this in return makes for a much happier S, a much safer S, a much mentally healthier S, the little assistance the program would allow for bills would help our financial situation, taking some more burden off both of us, and most importantly, help S, help me, and more then that help us move on from this low point.

The biggest positive in this is I understand where S is coming from (I had to ask my mom to please back off a bit and she doesn’t understand like I do, and so now I ended up hurting her again and I don’t know how to help make her better again….:( but oh well for now, I guess.) and I know that she wants to get this process moving, and is working on getting it—in her own way, in her own time. And I know her, and everything else will be ok in time.

Negative: n/a so far.

Positive: mom is taking me to lunch today. And this morning she told me of some really great sources for looking into the 13 week program for S, that’s affordable w/ a payment schedule, which means we can get her license back soon, meaning it will be WAY easier for her to get a good job!!! :) Which means things are going to look up really soon!! :) Apparently this program also helps assist in bills and stuff too because they want to help people get back on their feet—thus doing their program. :)

Negative: I was so tired I could hardly keep my eyes open while I was even driving to work in the morning!!

Positive: I got home, ate some take out chinese food, watched a few episodes of The Office and went to bed. Way early! And S told me to sleep the whole night, she’d do the route by herself so I could get a good nights sleep. :)

Negative: S just told me how she is really feeling about life right now… I don’t know how to help her… I knew something was wrong, she’s been depressed… but I didn’t know it was this wrong…

Positive: I’m not so sure anymore…

_{And Bethany just completed this goal… now I don’t feel like I have any support… god damn I hate how I let other peoples depression get me down… I just can’t stand the fact that she’s so miserable. I don’t feel I can do anything to help her, I just hope to god I’m not part of the problem and that she will be ok. I want to help her get through this rough patch and get back on the up and up of moods…}