miscellaneous

Bullet

time is like a bullet from behind
I run for cover just like you
time is like a liquid in my hands
I swim for dry land just like you

time is like a blanket on my face
I try to be here just like you
time is just a fiction of our minds
I will survive and so will you

we are the only ones right now that are celebrating
and we are joining hands right now
we are the only ones right now that are suffocating
we are the dying ones right now

as the water grinds the stone
we rise and fall
as our ashes turn to dust
we shine like stars

kisses on the dancefloor in my past
I need some comfort just like you
beating like a bass drum time goes by
I want the last dance just like you

drowning in the flood of morning light
I’m only human just like you
do you hear the city waking up
I will survive and so will you

we are the ones the only ones
we are the ones the dying ones
we are the ones the only ones
we are the ones and we are joining hands
we are the only ones right now that are celebrating

as the water grinds the stone
we rise and fall
as our ashes turn to dust
we shine like stars

... put me on earth to do a certain number of things.
Right now I’m so far behind that I’ll never die (g)

Surprise Surprise – I received a telephone call for an invitation to an interview for tomorrow, Friday morning.
That’s like 5 correct numbers in the lottery.
Will see if the 6th number will come up tomorrow.

My upgrade for a new mobile phone is due by the end of July, so I checked the models on the market and decided for the Sony Ericsson M600i ... but it looks like most mobile phone shops have it taken out of their program – strange.

Anyway, I’ve been to my GP to collect a follow-up perscription, then to the chemist and then to Tesco, for some shopping.
At the check-out I notice a new face and what can I say.
I have fallen in love with her badly.

I know, I know – it’s wired. But the truth is, I was only in love twice in my whole life.
So it really means something to me.

I couldn’t take my eyes off her, and when I finished paying I left the store. Standing outside I was thinking about what I have done in the past years to find a partner – not much.

Because love is for the lucky and the brave, I went back inside and waited until it was my turn again … to see her … and ask her if I could take a picture with my mobile phone.
She smiled and asked: ‘Why ?’
I said: ‘Why ? ... Because I think you’re extremely beautiful.’
She smiled (a little bit embarrassed) and I just took the picture and vanished.

Well well well … as I mentioned, now I cannot stop thinking of her. She hits my soft spot ! and her voice is out of this world.
I will have to think of what to do next.
To be continued …

What were they thinking ?

In the Bathroom.

Yeah, in the bathroom … you know, little Thomas (6 yrs) was telling us this.
He was asking his mates from school Sophie, Rob, Chris, Allen … and all agreed.

But the teacher didn’t know. He asked: Why in the bathroom ?
Thomas said: Every Sunday morning my dad shouts in front of the bathroom door:

MY GOD ! How long does it take ?

I never promised you a rose garden
Along with the sunshine
there’s gotta be a little rain sometimes
When you take, you gotta give, so live and let live
or let go
I beg your pardon
I never promised you a rose garden

I could promise you things like big diamond rings
but you don’t find roses growin’ on stalks of clover
so you better think it over
Well, if sweet-talkin’ you could make it come true
I would give you the world right now on a silver platter
but what would it matter ?
so smile for a while and let’s be jolly:
Love shouldn’t be so melancholy
come along and share the good times while we can

I beg your pardon
I never promised you a rose garden
Along with the sunshine
there’s gotta be a little rain sometimes

I could sing you a tune or promise you the moon
but if that’s what it takes to hold you
I’d just as soon let you go, but there’s one thing I want you to know
You better look before you leap, still waters run deep
and there won’t always be someone there to pull you out
and you know what I’m talkin’ about
so smile for a while and let’s be jolly:
Love shouldn’t be so melancholy
come along and share the good times while we can

I beg your pardon
I never promised you a rose garden
Along with the sunshine
there’s gotta be a little rain sometimes

Lynn Anderson: Rose Garden

Two mates and I were sitting together bragging about how we had given our new wives their duties.

Brendan had married a woman from South America, and bragged that he had told his wife she was going to do all the dishes and house cleaning that needed to be done at their house.
He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away.

Larry had married a woman from Far East. He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking.
He told them that the first day he didn’t see any results, but the next day it was better.
By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.

I had married an English girl.
I boasted that I told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for every meal.
I said the first day I didn’t see anything, the second day I didn’t see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and I could see a little out of my left eye.

Enough to fix myself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher, and call a landscaper.

Of course I won’t laugh, the doctor said. I’m a professional. In over twenty years I’ve never once laughed at a patient.

Okay then, Fred said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It was no more than the size of a peanut.

Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.

I’m so sorry, said the doctor, really am….. I don’t know what came over me. On my honour as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won’t happen again. Now what seems to be the problem ?

It’s swollen, Fred replied

isn’t that a funny number plate ?

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