post randomly

She’s gone. The cancer was spread all over her body and there was nothing else to do than let her go. Even though I know it was the right choice, it doesn’t make the loss less hurtful. It was such a shock and I will miss her terribly. I hope she didn’t have any pains in her final days. She was the best dog ever.

Our 9 years old dog Caro has been quite bad shape lately. My parents took her to vet today and heard that she has a tumor :( The tumor is pushing her nerve and she can’t walk very well cos of it. Her lungs, bones and heart are still very good shape despite the fact that she is quite old already and my parents wants to try to save her. So she’s having a surgery on Friday.

I really hope that they will get it off. All of it. And that it’s not cancer. I try to think positively, but I am very worried about her. :’( There’s nothing I could do than just wait. Luckily I know that she will get the best treatment that is possible in Finland (she’s going to special animal hospital where a vet that is specialized to do surgeries like this will do it).

I don’t want to lose her.

♥

And I will go shopping a lot this weekend :D

And it has been really great. Sure there has been some boring days, long days and responsibility. Sure I got into accident with company’s car (there’s a little bump on the side). And last night I “broke” into the office and had to call security about the false alarm.

But I have gotten to know really nice people, spend a lot of time outdoors doing things that I love, learned about bats (and it’s actually quite fun to do bat surveys!). We also talked about the chance to educate myself a little more and get a degree of doing professionally nature surveys. That would demand a lot of work, but in the other hand it would give me great advantage on the upcoming works.

And I really like the company. I am so glad that I got a job from there. During a time when people are loosing their jobs so easily in this difficult financial situation, it’s good to be in a company which isn’t so vulnerable to markets.

And finally, we are going to Amsterdam in October for company’s excursion!! (It’s not sure that I will get to go, but I really assume that I will. It would be huge disappointment if I don’t for some reason…)

How cute is this!

My first huge crush (which wasn’t one sided) got married last weekend. I am very happy for them. They look very good together.

I have noticed that a lot of people who I know have either got engaged or married (or are getting married) in the past year. People are buying houses and getting babies. It seems that people are now longer “young adults”, they are adults. Starting a family life with steady jobs, house and a car. That makes me think about my own life. I am not there yet. Not in adult life. At least it doesn’t feel that. Sure, I am already 26 and graduated. But I don’t have a job. I don’t want kids. I still don’t own a car and I live in a rented apartment. I don’t want own a house (apartment would be nice, but that’s not gonna happen until I have a job).

But I would like to get married. Not yet. But maybe in few years. Before I turn 30. Though we haven’t even got engaged (which sometimes frustrates me cos people around me are). I have thought about what my our weddings would be like. I guess every girl have. They wouldn’t be traditional weddings: no church, (maybe) no white dress, more friends than relatives celebrating with us. And honeymoon! That would be in some awesome place, maybe Aruba or some cool city like New York.

I guess I just keep dreaming…

I’ll be in airplane heading towards sunnier and warmer location :)

I got a text message this morning from my ex-boyfriend’s dad who invited me to my ex’s and his sisters (I just realized that he meant his daughter V. and not L.’s girlfriend! I don’t even know does he has a gf, but for some reason I thought that would be her) graduation party to their home. He was very sorry that he forgot to invite me and was a bit late cos of it.

There are many reasons why I find this very weird:

1. I haven’t seen my ex or talked with him since we broke up 5-6 years ago (or something like that). It’s been so long that, I can’t even remember, lol. We didn’t broke up as friends either. At least there was a lot of bitterness from my side. Of course nowadays I feel very indifferent towards him. But I still can’t see any reasons why my ex would have wanted his dad to invite me.

2. I haven’t either seen his parents after this. I did like them a lot and they did like me. But still: inviting a ex girlfriend to their boys party is not something I find very appropriate. At least not when they haven’t seen in years.

3. We weren’t together more than a six months, so it’s not like we were long time together and become like family friends or something.

4. I never liked his sister too much and she didn’t like me too much either. After a time, she started to like me a bit though, but not enough that even she would like me to be there. LOL. I didn’t even remember her name until now. :D

5. I am not sure if he (the dad) intended to invite someone else than me and send that message to me accidentally. That’s more likely cos I don’t see any reasons why he would want me to be there. It wasn’t a group message like to all his contacts, cos he precisely said that he intended to invite me (didn’t mention my name though), but forgot (unless he has forgot to invite all, lol). But that’s another thing I find odd: that he still has my phone number on his cell. I have deleted his and my ex’s a long time ago.

I replied politely that thank you for the invitation and that I can’t come. And asked to deliver my best wishes to them for the graduation. He replied that he will and apologized again for the late information. (Like I would have come even if he would have invited me earlier.) However it would might been worth seeing everyone’s face when they would have seen me coming there :D But I am not too much fan of awkward situations, so I will pass.

This was just so odd and random that I had to share. :D And this is the all of the time that I will use thinking of this.

is tomorrow. I am happy that the days are getting longer again after tomorrow. Today and tomorrow the days are shortest in the year. The sun is up only 5 hours and 20 minutes here where I live. Luckily I live this south. In my old home town the sun is up hour less and in up north like Rovaniemi it’s just 2 hours and 14 minutes. And all the way up in Lapland, norther than that the sun doesn’t even get up at all.

When the days get longer, I get more energy. I hope that the snow stays. It’s not that dark when the ground is white.