heaveemetal in Denver is doing 38 things including…

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heaveemetal has written 33 entries about this goal

Some words written by... 2 months ago

an artist whether they be a poet, musician or someone who puts raw emotion to a paper the way a painter fills a canvas
set to music that is matched the way a precious stone is matched to its setting
and recorded to be integrated into someones life
who identifies with those ideas
to the point that they carry that individual through rough patches
are one of the mysteries of life.
A valuable way to cope
and cheap therapy…

One example from the thousands I could have chosen.
The lyrics of “Changes” by “Yes”

I’m moving through some changes
I’ll never be the same
Something you did touched me
There’s no one else to blame

The love we had has fallen
The love we used to share
We’ve given up pretending
As if you didn’t care

Change changing places
Root yourself to the ground
Capitalize on this good fortune
One word can bring you round
Changes

I look into the mirror
I see no happiness
All the warmth I gave you
Has turned to emptiness
The love we had has fallen
The love we used to share
You’ve left me here believing
In love that wasn’t there

Change changing places
Root yourself to the ground
Word to the wise – Well you get what’s coming
One word can bring you round
Changes

When I look into your eyes and try to find out how
There’s no way to save it now
And everything I feel
Changes
Keep looking for
Changes
Changes

For some reason you’re questioning why
I always believe it gets better
One difference between you and I
Your heart is inside your head

One word from you
One word from me
A clear design on your liberty
Who could believe when love has gone
How we move on like everyone

Only such fools
Only such jealous hearts

Only through love changes come

Change changing places
Root yourself to the ground
Capitalize on this good fortune
One word can bring you round
Changes

One road to loneliness
It’s always the same
One road to happiness
It’s calling your name

Change changing places – Changes
Root yourself to the ground
Capitalize on this good fortune
One word can bring you round
Changes

Change changing places
Changes
Root yourself to the ground
Word to the wise – Well you get what’s coming
One word – One word can bring you round
Changes



Untitled 3 months ago

Upon reflecting on those chances you had
to interject
or make a difference
and instead chose to remain silent
and accepting things as business as usual
Do any looks back make you wish
that a light had gone on in your mind
and action as simple as a holding of another s hand been attempted?



I had to bring my... 3 months ago

plants in tonight.
The weekend was perfect…low 80’s for high temperatures.
Today was quite the contrast…The high was 35 degrees lower,
It snowed.
Very early this year for inclement weather
The next 2 days are a continuation of the pattern.
My plants hate temperatures below 50
They’ve moved into the house with me.



Differences... 3 months ago

and a wide range of members from every walk of life
So much experience
and wide range of beliefs
Personal integrity
The members I have met here those that are long gone and those that still remain
Have touched me
given me hope and motivated me
towards independence from the ordinary
and achievement



I've always maintained... 3 months ago

a viewpoint that growing older isn’t for wimps.
Sure, a year here or there is no big deal.
But the process of addition eventually brings one to a crossroads.
If attention is paid the road is easier…I think.

My Mom has had problems here and there for quite some time.
A smoker for more than 5 decades, a non believer of any sort of exercise and someone who really never had a passion to continue learning or foster interest to stimulate her brain cells…

Bad combination.
Then add stubbornness, the I won’t listen syndrome and her me first and always motto.
There is trouble.

For years she has had a hearing problem.
No amount of persuasion or logic will make her go get a hearing test.
People with hearing aids are old you see.
So if you don’t have a hearing aid…you’re fine.

And for years she had deteriorated mentally.
slowly losing herself, the thoughts and memories that make her an individual, are leaving her.
We have spoken at great length about it.
I have.
She has denied there is a problem.
Everyone knows there is.

In the year of 2001 during one fun episode, she lost her purse, her car and herself into the mental ward of a Tuscon area hospital.
The mess took me 8 months to fix…2 trips there and a lot of anguish.
I made her sell out and move here…to better manage what I saw coming down the road like a logging truck with no brakes.

I’ll leave out about 5 chapters of examples of her deterioration now…more instances of being careless with identification and checks, giving out her credit card numbers and the like. The forgetting of important events in her past…and people.

We are now right up to the present day.
She has had some health problems concerning ability to breathe.
And gone to the emergency room a number of times.
During one of these visits, she lost her wallet with debit card, Drivers license and the usual other things on board.
Years ago, I told her to only carry some cash and her I.D. along with keys in her pocket…and leave her purse behind
But anything anyone has ever offered to her during her life has been ignored.

I took care of her changing of the bank account and new debit cards…the bank knows me well, I’ve had to do it for her 4 times now. No one will steal her identity again on my watch…

BUT, in our new security conscious world…getting a new drivers license and social security card is not so easy.
You need a birth certificate or passport.
She has never had a passport.
And has no idea where her birth certificate is…

3 1/2 weeks ago, I got here the 1-800 number to the state she was born in the get a replacement.
She denied I ever gave it to her.
last week when I was at her house I had her look in her purse for it.
And there it was.
She hadn’t looked, It hadn’t even occurred to her to look in there.
The place where she has always put everything.
Because she can no longer think.

I told her to call Monday and start the process of getting a new Birth certificate…
She has been trying for a week to.
But she can’t yet.
She can’t even answer the questions they ask you to make sure it is you they are speaking with…

See, I couldn’t prevent her identity from being stolen by Alzheimer’s disease.

By the way.
I asked her to make an appointment with her doctor a month a ago for this week, so I could go with her
To be tested for Alzheimer’s

But she didn’t.
and won’t.

When I asked for an explanation, she said “I don’t want to have Alzheimer’s”
(Like the little hearing aid story I related above)
In spite of my pleas that if she would get some meds, the symptoms might recede for years.
And my logical argument to her that stated,
“Not going to the doctor because of your denial will not change the fact you may have it,
When you have an attack of not being able to breathe and resist calling 911, it doesn’t go away either”

It’s a shame that such behavior can just ruin her quality of life.
because soon she may not be able to live on her own.



Untitled 5 months ago

I guess we are all products of our experiences, observations and chosen paths…
The hours, days and years add knowledge and seasoning…
What turns and scenery the road of life treats us to!
And satisfaction with our days revealed makes for smiles…



I enjoyed this so much... 6 months ago

I took a picture with my cell phone and E Mailed it to myself…



In case of emergency... 7 months ago

and supposing the search found something barely usable…a taillight lens can be manufactured for a 2002 Toyota Tundra pickup from a red Christmas gift bag and duct tape…LOL!...



Little things I find I can relate to...everyday icons like music...God, I love it... 7 months ago

The meaning behind Red’s video, Death of Me, is explained by Randy in an interview, We used (the) twins (and a double of vocalist Michael Barnes) to symbolize two opposing forces in the video, ‘Death of Me.’ In it, we see the positive side of things being chased by the negative side of things, and in the end there’s a battle. The battle doesn’t seem to resolve itself in the video. That’s because we will face struggles in our lives, even though we do find resolve in certain situations.



I have seen it coming for a while... 11 months ago

most certainly for 5 weeks…

The sudden withdrawl of your “friendship” because I continually didn’t meet certain “conditions” that you imposed on it will be of no loss at all to me…

Because a friendship that depends on one persons conditions probably never existed…

So don’t ever e mail, text or call me again…



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