hoydenlala is doing 27 things including…

heal myself


 

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hoydenlala has written 4 entries about this goal

Think for myself to be true to myself

Figure out your opinions and identity. Then assert them. Stop being willing to be whoever others want you to be.

This was a significant issue for me for many years. I was too willing to sacrifice my dreams, goals, personal boundaries, and opinions in order to fit in/ please others.

I stayed in a job I that made me miserable for too long out of the desire to be of “service to others.” I gained a lot of professional skills and contacts but it came at a great cost. After that job, I felt very traumatized, lost, and usure of who I really was.

I also tried to be a more traditional woman to the guys I dated when I’m really very driven, independent, competitive, radical, and intellectual.

Sometimes I still struggle with what my next career should be. A part of me still wants to please my parents by picking something they would like that would make a lot of money, instead of picking something that would make me happy and fulfilled.

I’m also troubled by how my natural curiosity makes it difficult to figure out what I want to focus my life on. I have so many interests that it can be distracting and disperse my energy and attention. If I want to make a significant contribution, I have to pick something and be committed.



Maintain a fresh and young mindset

-try new things, styles, places
-keep an open mind and avoid being reactionary/disapproving
-don’t settle for what you’ve already done.



Strengthen my intuition

I have some books on this topic I want to read.



how?

-Harness the vital force (chi/kundalini) of my own being.

-Realize and trust that no matter what mistakes were made, in the end my basic nature is good.

-Forgive myself for mistakes that caused harm to myself or others.

-Embrace my innate ability for kindness by realizing that beneath any difficult event or person is light (and that all transgression is simply a dimming of the light).

-Maintain humility around any good deeds I perform.

-Accept myself and the past.

-figure out what counts and what does not

-find what pushes my happiness buttons. Is it a person, pet, activity, place, state of mind? What can I rely on to take me out of myself when I’m having a hard time?

-remember that I’m not in control of the universe, even though I have numerous personal responsibilities to fulfill.



 

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