grieve

is in hospice.

I have been dreaming about her.

missing Willie. i wish they would find him. I am a little despondent. however I am having a bit of time to be alone and vulnerable which I needed

about holding my grandmother in my arms last night. I set her down for just a second and she died. My grandfather and I held each other and cried an cried.

Never did find my missing friend,  the family did however decide to have a memorial in October.  The limbo has been painful.

30 days now, some times I catch my self holding my breath

2 weeks now. we helped on the search and rescue. the official search has been called off. it is heartbreaking

I think we have lost a friend, missing now for over a week, I am trying to hold on to faith

my grandmother passed away today.
She was the mother of my wonderful stepdad.
this is the anniversary of my great grandmother ,
Pearl’s death as well. Meaningful for my mom.
My mom and my dad have both lost their mothers
in the last 3 months. I am feeling such sympathy for them.

my mother is grieving
we both lost our fathers in the same year
now our mother in the form of my grandmother.
nothing stands between her and death,
tonight honest music has opened my heart
to my own grief
and hers

Helen died on the 28th of January, I got to be with her for which I am eternally grateful. She was 99 years old and lost her twin brother when she was 19 years old. He stepped off a cliff. I know she missed him all those years. I just returned from a journey across the southwest, places I know she had been. I thought of her so often while traveling. She was there in the thirties when it was mostly dirt roads. She used to travel with her father to the Navaho reservation to pick up students bound for college. Her father was an educator and she was too. She was one of my mothers, maybe the most unconditional love I experienced in my life, I miss her.

2 friends in the past couple weeks. Grief just hit me yesterday. I was at a concert and the music made me cry and cry.