Over the past year, I’ve had a lot of eye opening experiences including, but not limited to, selling our first house, leaving the city we’d considered our home for six years and all the friends we had there, moving to a new country, the shock of dealing with the fact that divorce was actually an option for us (thankfully we worked through that!) and the realization that I had no idea how to handle myself as an individual rather than a part of a family unit.
Lately, I’ve taken more time to do things I want to do because I want to do it, not because society expects it, not because of company guidelines dictating how I look or what I wear, not because someone else might like it… but me.
I can do things in my own time, in my own way and I have no need to feel bad because others may think I’m moving too slowly or not working hard enough. I’m starting to do things for myself, and that helps me stay in touch with who I am as a person.
I’m still doing things for and with my family. After all, they are most assuredly a part of me, but they aren’t ALL of me. I refuse to feel guilty for being more than a mother, more than a wife, more than an individual person. There’s nothing wrong with wearing different hats throughout the day. It’s finding the balance between them all and getting everyone that I have to be to play nice.
Another part is figuring out exactly where my boundaries are. Morally, personally, professionally… how far will I, and how far can I go?
