jeff covey in Baltimore is doing 13 things including…

take a vacation


 

jeff covey has written 10 entries about this goal

48 Hours

Thursday was the first anniversary of Glenn’s death. I looked into renting a cabin for a night or two like I’d done on the first month anniversary, but the West Virginia and Pennsylvania park services only rent cabins by the week bring the peak season. I decided to take a break at home. I spent the first half of the week cutting down my todo list so I wouldn’t have unfinished chores on my mind, then finished my work by 5:00PM Wednesday and planned to do Friday’s work starting at 5:00PM that day. That way, I could effectively have two days free while only having to take off one day of work.

At 5:00 on Wednesday, I shut down the laptop, iPad, and iPod, and hid them away in a closet. I threw a sheet over the TV, turned all the clocks face-down, and reclaimed the freedom of not knowing what time it is. As before, I made no plans, and just did what I felt like doing as I felt like doing it. I ended up spending a good part of Thursday at the nearby State Forest, finishing a lot of writing on Glenn’s memorial.

By the end, I felt I’d only scratched the surface of the amount of time it would take to really decompress, but I hope I can return to my routine with some perspective on what I’m doing and whether it’s what I should be doing. I do think I should take the tech-limiting methods I used here to carve out a few analog mornings each week.



Labor Day

My sisters have agreed to stay close to Dad while I head to the Oklahoma City PrimeTimers gathering over Labor Day weekend. It will be the first time I’ve been there since 2002, and the first trip I’ve taken since Glenn became sick in 2008. I’m watching a kayak.com plane ticket price alert and looking forward to a little break from the routine.



Cunningham Falls

It’s been two months to the day since Glenn entered the hospital, and one month to the day since his death. I’ve started to be overwhelmed by the number of things to be done, the number of decisions to be made, and that aspect of grief which precludes doing any of it because your brain feels like it’s swimming through molasses, and all you can do is sit and stare. Burning out, I opted for a change of scenery and routine.

I decided to rent a camper cabin for two nights in Cunningham Falls State Park. These are small cabins with just enough room for a double bed and a pair of bunk beds. They have electrical outlets and an overhead light, a door which locks with a key, a picnic table and barbeque grill, and a water supply and spotless bathhouse a few steps away. Our parks have erected them in recent years on sites which were previously just for tents and RVs. (The campgrounds are now a mixture of the two types of sites.) They offer a chance to sleep in the woods to anyone who would be put off the idea by having to buy a tent, pitch it, and blow up an air mattress.

It was a good fit for me. I wanted a couple of days away from todo lists, the Internet, phones, and unnatural light, and to test my capacity for consuming banana sandwiches. Most of all, I wanted to get away from clocks, to spend just one day with no idea what time it was. This was spoiled when I realized I’d made an appointment for Thursday afternoon, was going home Thursday night, and had to turn on the cellphone. It was a good run until then. I’d still like a few days when the sun runs the show, waking and sleeping on a natural cycle.

I did, at least, spend the day with no plan, doing whatever I felt like doing next. (That turned out to be a little hiking, a lot of sleeping and porch sitting.) It wasn’t a vacation, but made a fine breather. I smiled many times at little sights and sounds and smells which brought back instant, vivid, and forgotten memories of summer camp, and delighted at how much cooler it was away from the city, under the forest canopy, with the breeze blowing up the mountain. It gave time to just sit with Glenn being gone, and let it sink in a little deeper.

With everything that’s going on now, it’s the best I can do, but it did whet my appetite for something longer and more remote. These camper cabins are part of a ring of other sites, the nearest just yards from you, so don’t go into it expecting Walden Pond. No one was rowdy, but aside from the morning, there are always voices in the distance, and cars driving around. Some of the parks have larger cabins with kitchens, sitting off by themselves. I’ll plant packing off to one with a stack of books and a week of groceries as a dream in the back of my mind.

It did strike me that, at $50 a night, these cabins would make a great alternative to hotels for travelers who don’t mind bringing their own linen. There were several good restaurants near the park, and a camp store for anything you forgot to bring. The only other commodities lacking would be the hotel room phone (who uses that anymore?) and cable TV. Maybe an evening of walking the woods or sitting at a fire with other campers would make a welcome change from dozing off to The Late Show.

I’ve put up photos and a video at http://www.flickr.com/photos/jeffcovey/sets/72157627344932167/



vacation at rehab

my partner’s health took a turn for the worse, and i ended up taking him to the emergency room thanksgiving eve, three days before my “vacation at home” was to start. i’m glad i’d planned to take the time off anyway, and could easily spend my days with him at the hospital and then at the rehabilitation center he entered a week later.

it was a relief that i’d thoroughly purged my todo lists before this started, and didn’t have unresolved work on my mind during this time. i got a good bit of reading done while he was sleeping, and put in some time with music in the mornings and evenings. it’s been fairly easy to get back into the swing of work thanks to the pre-vacation preparation. by getting up early, i’ve been able to get my work done before heading over to be with him.

i’m glad i still have a lot of vacation time available; we’ll see what the coming months bring.



vacation at home

i can’t plan any travel right now because of my partner’s health problems, but i have 30 days of unused vacation time piled up, with five days lost forever due to not taking it. i decided to just take some time off, and asked for 12/1-12/12. with the weekends, that will be 16 days altogether.

i plan to do everything that was on my todo list for those dates between now and the end of the month, then have no plan for that time. for at least the first week, i want to lock the laptop away and have no internet access. looking forward to getting out of the routine and taking a fresh breath.



my week off

my week offline was wonderful. i didn’t touch the computer for nine days and didn’t set the alarm for most of them. everything important got done without the help of a todo list. the days gradually grew back to their true length, instead of disappearing down a black hole of unfinished tasks. i’m slashing my todo list today, deleting the oldest undone items on it. i need to keep spending more and larger chunks of time offline and relearning how to let small bad things happen and how few things are important.



on my way!

i’m wrapping things up and putting my usual routine out of sight and, hopefully after a few days, out of mind. see you on the other side!



vacation at home

i’ve claimed some of the time due me, and am taking off 4/14-4/18, effectively nine days with the weekends. i’ve decided to make no plans for going anywhere during this time. instead, i’m going to:

  1. print my whole todo list friday night and file it away.
  2. put the laptop in a closet in the basement.
  3. not touch either of the above until at least wednesday.

i imagine i’ll get some overdue garden and housework done in this week, but mostly i just want a few days with no prescribed schedule, when i wake and do whatever i feel like doing. what new ideas will occur when i have extended time to think? what will i realize i really want to do that’s getting lost in all the things i “should” do? when i come back to my todo list, how many things will i just scratch off as unnecessary?

this is what i need now, and i think this regrouping and head clearing will make it easier to get away on trips away from home this summer.



need to keep making free time

i get too busy and forget that a vacation is a possibility. then, when i remember it, i ask what i would do with myself. (diving back into music often comes as the reply.) i should just do it in 2008.



getting over the guilt

working from home, i think i’ve always felt a little guilty about the
idea of taking a vacation—a vacation from what? i feel so privileged
to be able to make my own work schedule that i never take an extended
block of time away. i haven’t claimed a single day of sick or vacation
time this year, and have six weeks piled up and ready to roll over to
2008. i feel an urge to take the plunge and see what it’s like to force
myself to ignore my employer completely for a month or more.



 

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