stay in love

i don’t want to delete the memory of being so happy. so i feel like i have to select the give up option.
i didn’t give up. in ways neither did he. i suppose circumstances change the way people feel & view each other, & due to an unrelated circumstance i guess it was too hard to get back into that frame of mind.
it’s godamn hard still wanting someone, who still says they want you, but just having to accept that sometimes things don’t work out the way you want them to. it hurts that an emotion can make you feel on top of the world, but can also make you feel like nothings worth bothering with anymore.
i’m not giving up, or falling out of love. i’m just having to let it fade away.

if people do read entries before cheering, & you’re considering cheering this goal; for the moment, don’t. there are ups & downs in everything, & while i’m still in love, it’s a little more complicated right now. i’m not going into the explanation, but for the moment, cheer on other goals of mine, because i don’t need to be cheered on in love right now, i’m going it alone until things, if they do, get back on track.

it’s still ever so lovely. almost eleven months, no long time by any means, but it’s still happyjoydance that many months in. yay!

i’ve found someone beautiful who i hate being apart from. i want to let him know everyday how much i appreciate him & how much he mean to me. it’s not been a hard thing to do since i spend most of my time with him, & when he’s not there i’m thinking of him, but i want to continue doing that for the most important boy in my life.