Stop throwing up

last night was one of the most horrifying thing of my life. i felt wicked sick to i went into the bathroom cause i had to throw up, but i was really upset about that becuase throwing up makes me happy. but then it was almost all dry heaves and it hurt to bad. and it tasted like stomach acid. it was really scary. and after that i ended up sitting on my bed all night just dry heaving, like my stomach wanted to bring something up that just wasnt there…..

i dont want to stop. there are too many harmful things going into my body and throwing up is the only way that i know of to get them out of my system. also the need to lose weight also plays into this. i am replused by my body and it needs to change. this is the only way that i feel i can achieve the body that i so yearn for. although i have not had great effects at this i feel that if i do it every time i eat instead of just doing it when i feel that i have eaten to mucch, my results will be better.

that is my plan..