be healthier

....other than having my esophagus stretched in January, I haven’t had so much as a head cold since last November. I’m eating better, and taking a lot more time for myself. For now, I’ll consider this one “done”.

...which is shocking, since I usually come down with a monster head cold the week after the show closes. My health is a lot better than it was a year ago. Maybe I’m finally learning to take care of myself? Or maybe I’m just finally learning to be a little kinder to myself….I guess they’re both shades of the same thing.

I have had some minor bouts with headaches & nausea, but nothing so substantial that it knocked me out for more than a couple of hours (instead of a couple of days).

...an eating disorder where you avoid eating when you’re anxious?

With the opening of our musical coming in just a few weeks, I’m finding that I’m skipping meals more and more often out of sheer anxiety. My thought process goes something like this: “Hmm…I have these 5 things to do which are REALLY weighing heavily on my mind. If I don’t get them done NOW, they may get totally bogged down later. Crap! It’s my lunch hour. I can either eat or I can get this stuff done….”

My solution for the past few weeks has been to stock up on quick, healthy foods that I can assemble into a quasi-meal or mini-meal, and to keep a small store of energy-boosting snacks around the office. I do NOT want to subsist on fast food! I made another grocery store run today to stock up again on fruit, nuts, etc. so I don’t starve over the next two weeks. I would rather be eating better balanced, home-cooked meals, but at present I’m working 60 hours a week until this show is OVER and I can relax a little. My poor husband knows he basically has to fend for himself for the next three weeks…

Well, time to pop something in the oven for dinner. I feel like such a cheater…

...and everything went fine. They wound up stretching the very top of my esophagus, and the very bottom. I can feel the stretch at the top—the back of my throat is a little sore, and eating since this morning has been a little weird. It feels like I have an extra “pocket” back there. I haven’t eaten too much yet because the sensation is so strange.

Thanks for your concern and good wishes, though!

...stupid head cold….stupid fever…

....grumble grumble grumble….

Why can’t my students keep their germs to themselves?

...grumble grumble…

...that I get my esophagus stretched. Yum. They’re going to knock me unconscious again and stick tubes down my throat.

At least the GI specialist will be able to look at my esophagus in the absence of trauma and figure out if the whole esophagus is narrow, or whether I have scar tissue, or whether I have some kind of muscular paralysis going on.

Hopefully, I won’t have to do this kind of thing too frequently! I am not a fan of being sedated…it really freaks me out.

So, way back at the beginning of the school year, I had a nasty incident in which I had a piece of food get stuck in my throat, resulting in a trip to the ER, sedation, and an endoscope.

It happened AGAIN a week ago. This time it was a small piece of beef, not chicken, that got lodged in my esophagus.

It appears that my GERD is much more severe than I had surmised, and it’s causing this esophageal stricture problem. I’m 27. How is this possible?

The most upsetting part of this for me was the fact that I had a bad time coming out the sedation—my heart rate and blood pressure dipped so low that they wheeled a crash cart outside of my ER cubicle. Thankfully, they didn’t have to use it, but I am disturbed by how serious my reaction was to the medication—and I’m frustrated that I have the problem in the first place!

Sorry if this seems a little whiny, but it was a very sobering experience, and it’s making me rethink a lot of the stressors in my life. For the first time, I am seriously considering leaving my present job for a less stressful and time-consuming line of work. I am trying to figure out what I need to do to help my own health improve. I just wish I could voice my own needs more clearly at the moment…