feel better about myself

I’ve been working more and that has done wonders to improve my self esteem as well as my pocketbook. :)

I’m a horrible, horrible person! I found out some great news about a friend and that has sent me on a first class way to depressionville, I was already half way there but this gave me jet speed to get there. Wow, it takes a horrible horrible person to hate themselves in the light of someone elses good fortune. I suck. No wonder sucky things happen.

I need to make some serious changes to help bring this goal into reality. I suck at change, but it has to be done to help realize so many of my other goals.

I woke up feeling like a total loser, cow this morning but this evening I feel much better about the day. It helped having extended family visitors and the happiness they brought to the house. It also helped having the little baby around, when he is around you can’t help but smile and be happy!

feeling down today, well to be honest the last few days. I dunno whats going on but I’m just depressed.

Don’t really know what to say except that I’m just blah and my feelings are all mixed up.

waking up hating myself. I did that today :( I slept in far too long but my body seemed to be craving sleep. I didn’t have a job for today and that always makes me feel like a loser. I hate these feelings of guilt and shame and just heavy depresseion. HOpefully my mood will improve as the day goes on.

I’m not feeling too hot on myself today. Just feel kinda blah and apprehensive about the stuff I have to do this week. Overall I’m just in a funk and not really happy. :(

end of discussion

I’m doing really poorly with this goal. I hate myself now, more than I have in a long time and it’s not getting any better. :(