keep my anger in check

i was driving to the airport the other night in some serious rush hour traffic when i had a complete meltdown. i have no idea why i can’t just suck it up and deal with it like everyone else does. nope, not me. i guess i’m the opposite of frank costanza. no “serenity now” for me which means no complete meltdown later. still, it’s not a good thing. maybe i should find my own improved version of “serenity now”. i guess that’s why i’ve got this as one of my 43things.

this is unfortunately, one of the goals that i really am not working towards achieving. last night it got really bad. i actually scared myself. i’m at that point where i don’t know what to do about it. do i talk to a therapist? i have no clue. the thing that really scares and upsets me the most is that i freak out over the stupidest crap – things that i have absolutely no control over. clearly this is the one goal (above all others)that i should make my top priority. no joking about it…no talking about it. this one needs action.

i really almost blew up at a client today. it was bad. sometimes you just get pushed too far. fortunately- or unfortunately (depends on how you look at it) i’ve already got a mark against me. i keep that in my back pocket for those times when i think i’m going to lose it. that’s definitely a quick solution.