keep my relationship loving and healthy

One of the greatest gifts a person can give to another is “listening.”

Niecy Nash said something in an episode of Clean House that struck me in the heart. She advised a constantly-fighting couple that in order to listen well, we must not anticipate what the other person is saying AND we must not be formulating in our minds what we’re going to say.

I am SO guilty of that! HB listens to my senseless chatter with a smile on his face, yet I interrupt him day in and day out. I will work on this enthusiastically this week.

1. He’s spectacularly good at finances
2. He’s the most clean and organized person I know
3. He happily accepts the responsibility of organizing me
4. The cats are his furkids too
5. His affections for Frosted Flakes at midnight
6. He spoils me with beautiful clothes
7. He flies my mom out to visit us… from the opposite side of the globe!!!
8. He’s really patient with me and my silly 2-month fads
9. He’s a two-finger typer
10. He doesn’t think I’m weird when I dance crazily down the hall
11. He pushes me to do better and be better – not because he thinks I should be better, but because he believes I can do better
12. He races home to me every night!!!
13. He laughs at my dorky jokes… And joins in them too!
14. He loves my cooking
15. He couldn’t keep his paws off me when I was fat, and a man who finds his woman sexy even when overweight, well, is a KEEPER!

SecondAvenue inspired me with her post how stale a relationship can be after some time. What happened to the wooing stage? What happened to the “rush” and the exhilaration that comes with every call and touch? When did I stop spending hours in front of a mirror before letting him even take a glimpse of me?

HB is so sweet. He loved me when I was overweight and he still loves me now. I love how his eyes widen when I wear certain clothes today just as they did when I had a hideous muffin top. When a man loves you no matter what shape you are (even naked!), you know you’ve got a gem.

Because I lost so much weight, I’ve worn nothing but baggy clothes, and I think HB is a little tired of it. I’m perfectly comfortable in a t-shirt and jeans and a hat, but I can tell from his eyes that he’d like me to wear clothes more to my new size (“What’s the point of getting a great body when you hide it all the time?” lol). He hasn’t made too many comments but I can tell it bothers him that these days the only shot he gets from me dressing cute is to go out on a date – and whaddaya know! We have TWO dates planned this week: today and tomorrow.

I love HB and appreciate the effort he makes to keep our relationship fresh by taking me on dates and it’s only fair that I make the effort to do it by accepting his generosity and buying new clothes that actually fit me.

So I’m hanging up the sweats tonight… A short shirt or fitted dress I go!

If after a few years of sharing financial responsibilities, making serious plans for the future together, wiping each other’s noses, and seeing each other’s best and worst (including pushing each other’s buttons…), and you’re still sending sexy pics of each other via mobile, you have to conclude that the relationship has still got it going on.

HB found my “stash” of his favorite candies that I hid in a special drawer. His breath practically confessed itself! (And how proud he was as he gave me his best jack-o-lantern grin)

So now I have to find a sneaky new hiding spot.

Little mischievous moments like these are what makes my heart burst with love for this man.

My darling fiance HB loves (understatement!) Skittles candies, and for awhile there, he’d steal packs out of the kitchen that bought primarily to stuff into his lunch. It became this running joke to where I have to frequently change hiding places and pretend to be mad whenever I hear drawers slamming in the kitchen during commercial breaks.

Sooo a couple of weeks ago, I bought a big Halloween bag of smaller bags of Skittles, stuck a post it with cute little inside jokes on each pack, and hid them all over the house and garage. It made me fall in love with him again every time he’d find a pack in a shoe, clipped onto one of his shirts, on the seat of his workout bike, in the drawer of his toolbox, inside his briefcase (I had to sneak that one in while he was in the shower!), in the empty coffee cup he reached for in the cabinet, etc.

Mission: Success!

I just thought of a sweet present for my honey. It’s a long-term project that I will need to work on daily to complete. As to when to give it to him (xmas, bday, vday or longer?), I have yet to decide, but I’m really proud of the idea because it’s so unique. I can’t wait to get started!

Haven’t done this lately, but will be working on it from now on. :)