I’m not sure anymore. It seems as if you have to uphold this stereotypical character to get somewhere. We, and I say we because although I’d love to be good and see the beauty inside the truth is that I want what I want dammit, are so superficial and we want this version of a ‘someone’ that may be impossible. I mean how many ‘goodlooking, single, succesful 30 year olds that are willing to understand and accept my bullshit are out there? I think none. I’ve realised that I have to accept and ‘fix’ me before even attempting to ‘date’.
It’s so funny, I was talking to my friends this week about it and they have various ideas of who my ‘somebody’ will be but my one friend said that I have to stop the self destruction and take care of myself instead. She is very honest and knows me well but it seems like such a difficult thing to do. We all want to come into a relationship with a fresh start but the truth is that we all come with baggage and that could mean the end of any chance of a strong relationship.
My question to anyone that is reading this is: ‘is this particular goal possible?’Honestly, is it possible to have the person you want to feel the same way of you? I’m not sure whether it’s possible. Why is it that even though I know my high school perceptions of the ideal guy is wishful thinking I still want it for myself. I’m not the most prettiest girl in the world, in fact I am very weird and plain, but I still wish I’d meet that ‘guy’. I know that statically speaking having a person recipricate the same ammount of love you give is stupid my theory is what the hell is the point? Seriously!
I’d love to hear theories and comments. I hope this entry makes sense. If not please send a msg and I’ll try to clarify.