Practice Gratitude

I love it when he reads to me.
there simply is nothing better.

tonight, Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norell.

this guy on the street – stood outside the coffee shop. I don’t know why, but I stopped & said hello. There was something about his presence that makes me smile remembering. Just some random guy, & yet, my heart is touched – reminding me that strangers have hearts too.

+ Grateful for K’s efforts that resulted in me getting a massage (she made the appointment, told me where to go & when)

+ for N’s gift of a pedicure (gonna do that tomorrow)

+ still touched by the spontaneous offers of support last week sometimes more than I could take advantage of!!

+ Thrilled that I am not sitting with this painful change in my relationship alone. (F told a friend, & he replied with “why are you telling /me/ this?”)—celebrating that while I settled on someone in my life who /could/ potentially respond like that (my next door neighbors on the south-side), it really took some HUNTING to find the possibility for this kind of reaction.

+ my host family from high school called out of the blue, & then has been calling back every couple of days to check in.

+ remembering to breathe, & even to laugh now & then

+ my cat has been unusually affectionate (& appears to have changed allegiances from F to me)

+ the raspberries are still producing wildly

+ One of my favorite coping strategies is to prepare healthy meals. —coulda been a sugar-fetish, but it’s more like kale…

it pays to stop & take stock of the gratitudes

1- an outpouring of support for me from friends near & far (2 continents, 5 states)—really taking in the love & care as it is offered! Breathing into this – I don’t want to let this pass unnoticed.
2- a well timed hug from a co-worker
3- trusting that I can be with all that is real for me, & if that means tears, ALL of those around me will be ‘OK’ w/ that (what a gift to not stifle!)
4- the silly little giraffe one of the volunteers brought me. He’s very cute. It cost her a quarter & offers delight.
5- my sense of perspective when I have it
6- having access to a car (what a gift towards EASE!)
7- this giant tomato that came in my vegetable box – it’s so bit I need to hold it with 2 hands & has all kinds of bends & irregular shapings. It’s totally beautiful & unique!
8- The sunset – as I walked, it was there right on the horizon full and round – ALMOST (as the clouds moved in front of it, it looked something less than round & seemed to change shape)
9- that I know someone who is DELIGHTED that he went to the dentist. My brain can’t quite handle that.
10- mis-hearing things so they come out meaning something else entirely!
11- i found my yoga mat!
12- acetametaphrin (sp?) after all other remedies didn’t help.
13- pistachios
14- chocolate
15- noticing the ‘off’ button on the radio.

1- my body is strong enough to let me play at yoga
2- I work with an incredible group of people who really care about eachother.
3- I have enough $$ to be able to share with a friend who needs it - I don’t think I’ve ever in my life had as much fun giving money as giving this week - raising over $1000 in less than a week.
4- I have art in my life. I am particularly grateful to local artists who produce & distribute FREE post-cards of their work!
5- through the magic of networking, able to find a happy home-stay for a cat whose guardians are moving out of state
6- organic flowers come with my box of organic vegetables from a local farm. I love the color.
7- The movie Tibet: Cry of the Snow Lion. YUM.
8- there are chemicals for this—there are chemicals which will (at least theoretically) stop my cat’s suffering from an active flea population. Much as I hate having the chemicals & having them in my house, I am happy for her that she need not suffer indefinately.

Maddly trying to find a parking place, running late, anxious about being there etc. Finally found a parking lot (with meters) that allowed for a maximum of 3 hours parking (for a 3-hour class).

When I got back to the car, I saw the meter maid, & the flashing numbers on the meter. I gazed at the windshield breathed a sigh of relief to have JUST missed her—no. I had a ticket.

I wandered over to the parking enforcement woman & enlisted her support of where to park for when I come back in a month. She asked me to go get the ticket, & took it back!!

I thought I had just gotten lucky when today I learned that she has done this many times for many people.

There’s something human about this. I’m not sure that’s a job I could hold—imagining NOONE is happy to see you, & NOONE is happy for your job well-done. I have much compassion for someone trying to make a living, in enforcing a job noone likes… I wonder if we couldn’t come up with some other way to get people to pay for parking, or to raise the funds that parking meters raise – in a way that would be more in integrity for all of us..

Anyway, grateful for the humanity of this woman, & will hold her in my thoughts at least for this week - I was contemplating how I might express my grattitude if/when she’s around next month - flowers? a card? some other kind of expression?

Ah, when HUMAN BEINGS can be HUMAN! Something about this gives me HOPE for the species – makes me happy to be the same species as her…

so at the farmer’s market on Saturday,

I was a little out of it, walked up to the fish-cake-seller-guy, handed him my money, said ‘HI!’[with that, was really sorely tempted to wander off mainly because of the absurdity of it]. I think he was tickled that I was doing everything out of order, when I finally managed to tell him what I wanted, he gave me the cake & my money & wouldn’t take payment—just said “for your well-being” & I was on my way.

I love that.

A little touch of humanity—I love it.

Oh, and fresh figs are in season. There is no more perfect ambrosia of the gods. I love THAT (ate a whole pint at one LONG sitting)!

the day is beautiful,
I took time to meditate AND practice yoga,
eating healthy today.

ah, grateful to myself for setting aside the time, grateful to the earth for making the day so pretty, to my cat for sitting here with me, my partner for going away today (leaving me ‘alone’ time), the people who are making my lunch while I decide what it will be….

ahhh

when I got overwhelmed, I noticed it & went for a walk…. not long enough, but still, a walk.

Wow, he went with me to a couples session. It took alot to get him there, it took alot for him to express, it took alot. I’m grateful.

so grateful it brings tears to my eyes.

huge stretch.