write down 100 happy thoughts to remind me of how good life is.

Wrote an email last night to a friend. When I bumped into her this morning she tells me that she and her husband where laughing hysterically at my replies to her questions.

Definitely a golden moment to know that sometimes I’m as funny as I think I am.

I think I’ve been avoiding this goal lately because, honestly? I don’t want to finish it. I started out thinking this was a silly goal, but now, looking back on it, these are some genuinely lovely memories that I might otherwise forget.

In the mornings lately, I’ve been getting Nuala out of her crib, and while I get her a dry diaper, I pop her onto our bed and whisper in her ear, “Go give Daddy a kiss.” And she climbs over and kisses J.

This morning I didn’t prompt her, and she still went over to give him a toddler (closed mouth) kiss.

98: Noodle loves Q

At Ikea today, I persuaded Q to sit in the regular part of the cart and Noodle was in the seat. His head was level with her hand and she turned and rubbed his hair affectionately. I just melt when I see how simply affectionate they are with each other. _{I mean, when it’s not more fun to pester the other one.}

At the cookie party today, a little 2 year old showed up at my leg looking up at me. We’re pretty friendly, so I picked her up and gave her a little toss. She giggled at me and I held her a minute, then asked if she wanted down. Shook her head no. She then hung out on my hip (and eventually on my lap) for the next half hour, sometimes cuddled up to my shoulder, later looking through a sticker book, and several times sharing space with Noodle who wanted to make sure J-a wasn’t stealing mommy like she’d tried to steal Noodle’s chair.

Humbling and uplifting. Sweetness like that is so simple, yet you can’t force it.

Last night we were at my mil’s for dinner and when we came home we did an abbreviated bedtime – no bath for the kids. So this morning, no surprise, as I’m nibbling on Noodle’s toes I notice that they’re a wee bit stinky. (Who knew she used her feet so much?) After breakfast I gave her a quick little bath and tried to let her play some, then bundled her into a warm towel, let her play some more, got clothes on her, read her a couple of books.

When her copper hair is freshly washed, the back curls up into ringlets. I have painfully straight hair, so I take serious delight in this. But more, there’s just something absolutely beautiful about a fresh cleaned baby or toddler. Their skin is so soft, hair smelling of baby shampoo, their newly diapered butts settling into your lap with a little thump. I nestle my nose into Noodle’s curls and breathe in, trying to savor the moment to relish all day long.

This morning the kids were being dropped off at Grandma’s, so we got them ready before I popped into the shower. As J showered and dressed, I hung out on the bed with Q and Noodle, her little back leaning against me as she looked at books, and I realized that I could go shower, but I didn’t want to miss out on any time with them.

Some days I’m desperate for some time alone, but I do love them ever so much.

Q is letting me kiss him at bedtime again.

The other night Noodle needed a little bit of rocking after waking. This time she thoughtfully woke up before I’d fallen asleep, so I could actually think while trying to resolve her issue. And as I wrapped her in my arms, I noticed how beautifully she fit, cradled into my body. She’s so small and amazing and this time in which I can pull her effortlessly into my arms is really so short. These baby years are sometimes so hard, and it’s easy to get caught up in watching all she is learning to do and longing to know who she will be.

But right now she fits in my arms while I sing to her.

Q doesn’t want to be kissed at bedtime. But as we put him to bed, J discovered a fun trick that Q adores: we pretend to be kissing his kitty (his beloved stuffed animal) and then miss and kiss Q instead. Q squeals and laughs with delight and then begs us to try to kiss kitty again.

This week I watched both ‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town’ and ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas’ all snuggled on the couch with the kids. (J was even with us one night.)

As Noodle would say, “Happy happy happy.”

Tonight as I was reading to the kids, Noodle made a point of snuggling her little legs under the covers of my bed (where I and Q were already snuggled) and I suddenly had a flashback to my childhood, getting under the covers in my mother’s bed when she was reading to us, and how absolutely safe and cozy that felt. And I realized that I’m doing a fine job of creating that feeling for my own kids. A very happy thought.