lose 100 pounds

256.6 is currently the magic number.

about 65 to my final goal

my meltdowns with food usually happen in times of high stress. today was one of those days, and i did fairly well balancing everything in moderation considering. i did snag a few extra treats (a beer, a dessert bar and some banana bread). that said, i avoided several worser choices and kept the portions reasonable. i’ll count today as a win.

In a little under four months I’m going to a friend’s wedding. I’d really like to bring a date… and a skinnier me. I think that’s a reasonable amount of time to focus on without going crazy, and I’d like to map out a plan from now until then for workouts and diet.

you know, the feeling you get after a good day. i just got home from the gym, took a shower and am writing some before bed. i sit here and i feel good mentally because i had the discipline to eat well, be productive, leave work at a reasonable hour, and hit the gym. my lungs still feel open, i feel refreshed and clean, and i feel the kind of tierd that falls nicely between restless and exhausted and which virtually guarantees a good night’s sleep…

i am out of practice at dieting.

i forget the art of this conscious willpower thing about 30 percent of the time… this morning i passed up a beautiful cinnamon roll. today at lunch, i skipped the burger and chose a relatively healthier chicken entree. but then, i couldn’t, just didn’t want to, pass up the huge piece of marble cake. yum. yum. yum. somehow i was convinced that this piece of cake on this day was special. i think in retrospect, i could have passed up my ‘moment’ with the cake and hopefully i can keep that in mind for future cravings. :) well, i passed up more junk and burgers for dinner. skipped dinner actually… i know thats bad but when the only choices you see are mcdonalds menu items, its probably better to call it a missed meal at eleven pm and just go to bed. so thats what i’ll do. i was active and busy all day, and it was an ok day, i’m still needing to have a great day, a real 10 to be feeling this.

i try not to be negative… but the fact is that i am just tierd of being overweight. i am frustrated. i missed the date for this goal… and if i keep going at this pace it would take me two more years to get down all the way there. maybe its time to just bite the bullet, stop talking and just do it. i have so much of my life under control except this one HUGE thing. how could i have even let myself get here in the first place?

I played hard this weekend :) i spent time playing volleyball, biking and walking… i’ve signed up for a few activities to keep myself busy and active this summer. my food and drink choices could have definitely been better recently, so i’ll make that my focus for the coming week. i am going to revisit the fine art of ‘journaling’ what i’m eating for the coming week, and trying to plan my meals the night before when possible…

i stepped on the scale again this week after a long absence. i have not been focusing on weight lately, but i have maintained a more active lifestyle, and healthier eating habits. i have not been losing more weight, but i didn’t gain a single pound either, which gives me hope that the changes i have made are maintainable. i’m fairly comfortable at this weight, but its probably time to give this goal another punch and to focus on losing another 15 or so pounds.

i have four months left to make good on this promise to myself. i know i won’t lose the full hundred by my birthday in four months, but if i could lose at least another 25 – 30 pounds by then I will not have let myself down… thats a pretty tall order. thats going to probably require a gym membership, and better planning on my part…

this would be so much easier if there werent days like today, when you wake up with a headache and want to do just nothing at all. i think i’ll take some aspirin, go grab a sandwich and do some yard work. well, got some work to do. later kiddos.

i’ve been busy and a little stressed lately. havent weighted lately, but did this morn… pretty much at a standstill since last weigh in. gonna get back to weekly weighs.

Start Weight: 290.8
9/3 256.4
9/10 255.6
9/17 252.4
9/24 254.8
10/1 249.6
10/8 247.2
10/25 248.6