Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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FAQ

lovely_lizzy in Germany is doing 42 things including…

stop feeling guilty all the time

111 cheers

 

lovely_lizzy has written 6 entries about this goal

Trying to be kind to myself

This will be tough! I just started working and now, in my second week, I am extremely nervous and eager to do everything right. This obviously isn’t possible. So now I really have to force myself to stay calm and not to start this vicious circle of thinking about what I did wrong at work and feeling guilty about it.
Today, after a very stressful day, I almost got into a car accident. It would have been my fault, but, to my defense, I didn’t know the street and it was a confusing situation. Luckily, nothing happened. Instead of being happy that nothing happened and feeling relieved, I just feel guilty and I can’t stop beating myself up about it. This is is stupid. I am a very careful driver and I haven’t had an accident ever. So, I should let myself of the hook, learn from the situation and move on. I’ll try to get into this mindset!!!



Here comes the guilt again

After I have been quite sane and ok with my guilt problems, I accepted that I commited some mistakes based on being in a dfficult situation and just being young and overpowered by my feelings from time to time. Now, that I am totally stressed because of my final exam, I can’t seem to get a hold of myself.
Last week I had a super bad incident with alcohol, about which I have been writing in another entry, and after that I realised that this mainly took place because I am and I put myself under a lot of pressure. So, I decided that instead of hating myself I’d have to be so much more forgiving to get over it.
But, with all of that behind me, at night, my sins of the past hunt me and I feel so bad that I can’t sleep…I relive all these embarrisng moments and feel guilty, guilty, guilty…
Well, at least I am trying to distract myself. But it’s so hard!



guilt trip

I feel guilty. last night I partied and drank too much. I was too loud,I talked stupid stuff and over-all I wsas just a drunk woman…I know I don’t like to be that way but it’s crazy that so many people always want one to be just like that….and with 24, it turns out, I am not to old to feel peer-pressure and give in to it. stupid!

But my point is this, I am actually a pretty serious person. I like to party, dance and have a drink or two, but generally I do not want to loose any control like that.I feel that it is not “the right kind of having fun” when you are too drunk. That’s I guess why I tend to run into problems with my alcohol consumption at parties. It ’s some part of me, the guilt-tripper I guess, that I want to silence. It’s this thought, “oh, come on, just get wasted, you can do it”. It’s my way of trying to do something crazy and to “suppress” my constant critic and all my guilty feelings.
However, this is so not the way!!!! I should loosen up in every day life and feel less “obliged” to do “the right thing”. And I should start with not feeling guilty right now! ok, I was drunk again, I behaved stupid…so what…bad stuff happens to good people…if I didn’t act all grown up that’s ok…lesson learned…
...why don’t I just laugh it of? why can’t I be more relax about it? why do I feel like a failure???



Untitled

as a very wise 43-member wrote to me, that because of my perfectionism/ extreme criticism I have a problem with really being in the moment. I have noticed this a lot lately. In the last months I have been stressed because of many things. now, I am getting better emotionally but I tend to have so many things on my mind that, although I know I am extremely lucky, I really have to force myself to feel relaxed and in the moment. and often, my worrying is there in the moment with me, like background music…what does this have to do with feeling guilty? well, I think that it has a lot to do with it. I think my stupid inner critic is proud of me because I am always focused! one day, I really should do some counseling about it…until then I do my best to convince my myself that I have a beautiful life right now, and that I do not need to worry all the time in order to keep it that way!!!!I try to level the background worrying down!



Untitled

I feel guilty…all the time!!! oh man, I know it is not right but it is so hard to allow myself to relax about my goals. I mean there really is no sense in it. all the stuff I am doing I have brought on myself. no one ever forced me to be so damn ambitious! I can limit this the way I want and still be ok. so why, why can’t I let it go???
the ambitious, driven part of me should even counteract this kind of thinking because it is not even productive. it’s even stopping me!
the human mind….it is working weird!!!



Untitled

I haven’t really done anything to work on that goal yet. the only thing I did was telling myself that feeling guilty and putting myself under too much pressure is stupid and plain crazy. but somehow this feeling is so deeply rooted into my system that I am sitting here tonight and feel guilty. Right at this moment I ought to do at least two different things. I can’t even decide which one is more important so I just feel guilty twice!
I know that that is not how it should be. I know it and so I try to ignore this feeling. but it’s still there….



lovely_lizzy has gotten 111 cheers on this goal.

 

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