Send the Perfectionist packing

Today I noticed again how deeply my perfectionism and working morals are rooted in me.
I just finished a really busy week. I basically tried to cover it all: do well at university, work on the side, exercise a little and be social….Well, all of this luckily did work. but what now??? Instead of feeling overly happy and proud of myself I just sit here and feel driven. It is like: what now?What next? so,I think about what has to be done and try to build a “strategic plan” for that. or I try to keep all the other stuff in order. Singled out, there is nothing bad about being like that but I know that for me it is not good. Deep down I use all my activities to value myself. It’s like getting points… but instead of building up a huge score that I am proud of, it is like I erase it again as soon as I am done with one project, so I have start all over again with zero points and no backup. I am taking away my own backup. That’s just stupid!!!

Just some days ago I realized that what I thought of as progress wasn’t actually progress. I thought that I was more relax about life in general but then my sister (who really knows) said something very true. she said that on the surface I may appear more relaxed but actually it is my inner perfectionist faking to be all calm, cool and collected!!!
and she was right. so now I really try to let go of my stupid expectations about how I, my relationships with other people or situations should work.

Great goal! Just what I should do with my annoying company!!!!