be more social

Visited old friends last weekend and went on a hiking trip with new friends the weekend prior. I am back truly getting back to my old self or maybe just a NEW self.

When I think of the times that I avoided social events for so many different reasons, it makes me happy that I’ve progressed so much. I realized a lot the progress has to do with enjoying my life more by doing things for me: challenging myself to go outside of my comfort zone and also spending time doing things that I love. I realize that the size of my comfort zone changes. When I’m stressed, tired, and insecure, that comfort zone is really limited. BUT, when I start taking care of myself, I notice that zone gets bigger and bigger and BIGGER! :) It makes me happy. I also know that I’m simply happier.

Crazy thing too is that I realized that the unrelated deaths of two high school classmates earlier this year really put things in perspective for me. I avoided seeing some classmates because I was worried about my current status of my life, how much weight I’ve gained, blah, blah, blah, but, literally, at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter. It really doesn’t! I hope I remember this on a daily basis.

I went to the funeral because it wasn’t about me. I went to pay respects and to appreciate lives lived. I thought of all the petty things of the past and let a lot of it go. I drove up in my dirty car, messy hair, respectful outfit, with a gazillion added pounds on my body, no makeup, and I just didn’t give a SHIT about what anyone else had to say about it all.

I have lived a great life too and not everything is visible from the outside. I am thankful for so many blessings as well as the hardships that have made me who I am, good and bad. The good can continue to shine and the bad can be improved. Life is so precious and I am truly thankful. I have learned a lot this year, especially cutting out toxic people.

So, I have been more social. I realized that changing jobs, lifestyle and just getting more rest has made me happier and naturally more sociable. I will have to meet more people and spend time with the people I enjoy spending time with. I also realized that by cutting out toxic people has put me in a better mood as well.

Reading my original entries reminds me of a time when I was not feeling like myself. It’s nice to read those old entries and realize how much I’ve changed lately. I am repairing my wings and flying again. It’s fun to have fun again. I know it sounds strange, but it feels great! :)

I’m bumping this one up higher on the list. I just read this tip about being more social again… Here are the two tips…

1. Arrange dinner or an outing once a week, and encourage your guests to bring new people.
2. Accept all reasonable invitations.

Anyway, I better pick a day of the week and get started. :)

Not a full social butterfly yet, but I’m getting there. I’ve definitely been more social again and it feels great. The only bad thing is that it takes up time from working on my personal goals. Once again, I have to find the right balance. I also think I want to be healthier before going more. I’ll take a break from being social.

Oh, just realized that I wrote an entry for the wrong goal. I’m changing it now. I have noticed that the whole say-yes-to-more policy has been proving to be effective in the is being social thing. If I don’t say yes, I’ve been trying to suggest an alternative activity or time. It’s nice that it’s working out.

So, I won some free tix to a concert and went on my own. My friend, who I was planning on going with, had to cancel last minute for work. I’m happy that I went anyway. It was a latin jazz concert and it reminded me that I’m afraid to go to things by myself and I have a mild self-diagnosed case of social anxiety. I guess I had a blast, so it made it all worth it and will encourage me to do it again.

So, a friend of mine had free passes to a foreign movie. It was so worth it. I’m so happy that I went since the plans were so last minute.

Then, I topped the weekend off with a girls’ night out. It was fun. I met an interesting guy, who is probably too young for me, but it’s good that I’m meeting new people!

I’m happy that I’ve been saying yes more than no lately. As I mentioned before, it’s more likely that I’ll get asked to do more things if I say yes. I just have to make sure that I keep a balance in my life. I felt really good about this weekend since I had a mix of culture, party, friends, family & alone time. Now, I’ll spend the evening relaxing and remembering my goals / direction. LOL! :)

So, I went on a date last weekend and had fun! It’s one of the nice guys I met through work and ran into at a party. It turns out that we have really similar goals and beliefs. I liked that. Well, I’m thinking that maybe we’ll be better off as friends. I don’t know why just yet.

I think I just know that I need to keep working on myself before I start anything new. I have to break that pattern of investing in a new relationship and neglecting myself. Yay! Well, we’ll see.

I guess it’s nice getting out there and being social again. It’s also flattering that a few guys have been expressing interest in me lately. It seems like it’s been awhile since I’ve really been dating dating. I guess I’m over the exhaustion from my last serious relationship. It feels good.

It’s strange since I know I’m not that young, but it’s been flattering. It’s also nice to see that guys really don’t mind the extra lbs that I’ve been carrying, especially if I don’t mind and I try wear it well.

So, I’ve been trying to go out more often. It’s not that I don’t want to be social, it’s just that I’ve been having a little anxiety about going out lately. I guess it’s because I haven’t been too happy with my overall situation. Anyway, it’s worked out because I’ve had a great time going to holiday parties and get togethers. I’ve met some new people and had fun. I’ve been feeling more spontaneous again, which I love.

So, the good thing about the economic slump is that it’s in to be “cheap.” It seems to more socially acceptable to lean towards the discounts or specials. Maybe, it’s just my cheap circle. It took some time to change, but I’ve been on a tight budget for awhile, which helped me to pay off my personal credit cards and car loan. Staying within the budget took major sacrificing (mostly social) and it was worth it. I miss my friends and am working on spending more time with the ones that I can. I stopped by a friend’s last week to drop off some fruit that I picked (free). I met up with friends for dinner and a play (discounted tix). I spent a lot on lunches for the past week and have to reign that in. I tried to look up free classes, workshops, etc. to attend with friends. I feel super cheap right now, but I want to hang out with friends and just don’t have a lot of money. It’s been nice catching up with friends. I just have to slowly incorporate it in since I still have to make sure that I always have time for myself. Balance…