improve my relationship with my mother

i am 45 years old and my mother controls 90% of my life… she has made it her life’s work to “take care” of me but not in a nurturing, loving, compassionate way…. it’s mostly financial and she has made me almost completely dependent on her… it’s a nightmare… i can’t do anything without being criticized and/or belittled for 1) thinking about doing something that she doesn’t agree with or 2) doing something that doesn’t quite turn out right in her opinion….... i find myself looking forward to her funeral and then i feel horribly guilty about that. I feel so helpless and all I want is to have a normal relationship with my mother.