I’m not sure why but so far I haven’t had the urge to have children. I have a lovely godson and sweet little nieces and nephews; friends of mine have kids; and I had a brother and sister who were some 10 years younger than me and I enjoyed helping out with them (changing their nappies, bathing them, feeding them etc).
I think some people are born wanting to have children, and others just aren’t. I don’t think I could be the kind of parent I would want to be – I’m too much of a perfectionist. And I can barely look after myself, my husband and my cats at the moment – how could I be responsible for a whole other being? Also, we don’t earn enough at the moment – where would we find the money to bring up a child?
Happily I have ended up with a man who doesn’t want children too. In fact he’s 100% certain that he doesn’t want to, whereas I keep imagining (and fearing) that one day I will wake up, biological clock exploding, and desperately want a child.
People who want to be childfree are one of the new minorities and as such I think we are sometimes misunderstood or demonised. Also we each have different reasons for not wanting to have children – we’re not a homogenous group by any means.
I am completely supportive (and appreciative!) of people who want to and do have children, and I feel desperately sad for people who wish they could but are biologically unable to have children. I hope people can find a way to understand, or at least accept, those of us who choose not to have children for whatever reason. We’re not all evil!
