heal from abuse

I have spent many years wishing this stupid asshole wouldn’t have a chance to affect my adult life. He already stole my childhood and I wasn’t willing to give him one more day. But, it was all denial. The truth is that I AM affected. I struggle with feelings of shame and worthlessness. Why didn’t the people who were supposed to love and protect me do so? Didn’t I deserve it? Instead I was used like I’m not even a person, just a toy for someone else’s fulfillment. I know it’s not my fault, but I still feel bad about myself. I don’t trust. I don’t think anyone will ever really care about me because I’m not worth it. I haven’t healed I’ve only pushed my feelings of anger and hurt away and it’s time to just be brave and face up to the facts. I don’t really know where to begin, maybe a peer group in town?