lose weight

Tuesday, 12-30-08
Hi!
It’s been five months since I’ve posted and I never quite made my goal of 125, but I did maintain a reasonable 130-135 for these past months. Now I feel like I’d better get back on the discipline band wagon or my weight will start to creep way up again. Posting really works-so here I go.
B: shredded wheat
S: mean green
E: 4.91 miles stairmaster

b: cereal
l: 2 bowls bean salad
s: nectererine, cottage cheese
d: 2 bowls tofu-veggie soup
s: blueberries

Feels great to be back on the program. Tomorrow I’ll fill up with plenty of mean green.

b: oatmeal
s: too many crackers
l: 2 tortillas and beans
d: pasta with spinach, salad

Well I’m back from DC and Asilomar. Not being able to post made it easy to go off the program. Asilomar was buffet for all of our meals and everything was top quality. I’m normally not much of a dessert person, but these desserts were incredible. Too good to pass up. I was quite aware of what I was doing and didn’t let myself totally binge (except on the lobster raviolis :-) so I gained about 5 pounds from my pre trip weight. Not that bad except I was still needing to lose 1o pounds. Okay no big deal, now I need to lose 15 pounds. I’m going to post every day like I had been before my trips because it’s the only way I’m forced to look at the reality of what I’m eating. I don’t expect you to cheer or even read this boring drivel, but it helps me to put it out there. If I don’t get back to losing I’ll start gaining again and that will make me sad. So here I am.

This is my motivator. It’s sort of sad, but the very morning that I left for my first trip I looked in the mirror, sans clothes, and I looked better than I have in like 30 years. So I will get back to that and even better.

By the way, I exercise almost every day and I don’t need motivation in that area. That’s why I tend to not include anything about my physical regimen, but I’m going to increase my workouts, just to bump it up a bit.

B: potatoes and eggs
L: tortilla, beans and cheese

This is my last daily post as we are leaving for DC tomorrow. It seems the whole county is in flames up here in Northern California. The smoke is so thick we aren’t going swimming, walking, or anything since we don’t want to damage our lungs. I feel bad for the wildlife: deer, bunnies and birds and our pets. Although I’m glad to be heading east to get out of this mess I pray our home and pets will be okay with the housesitter while were gone.

If I don’t post from DC I will start up again as soon as were back, on the 9th.

Thanks everyone for your encouragement and kind response. Keep at it and remember your doing it for yourself and remember life is indeed more satisfying as a thin, healthy person.

B: mean green, pancake
S: snap peas, orange, strawberries
D: veggies, tofu and rice
Well, I truly am down to 13o and I half thought the scale might go up again, but it didn’t. Got to rummage thru my “skinny” box and find some pants for DC. Still have a little way to go to fit into my old cords and the brown paisleys. The pink cords fit fine now which was my original big and final goal. Now that I’m seeing the reality of it (my butt) I know even the pink cords are still a bigger size than my height justifies. So here is my new and exciting goal—-to fit comfortably in my brown paisley cords by August. That should bring me down to about 12o, a very healthy and reasonable weight.

Anyway, that’s all for now. Oh yeah, way back when I started this goal I asked if loosing weight would improve my facial profile, as I noticed a very disturbing slackenig of my chin and jawline. Well, the profile is much improved and I no longer have that old lady profild. This goal is very much worth it, I feel so much better about myself and I love feeling lighter. I didn’t realize all the weight I’d been carrying around.

Once I’m down to 120 I’ll be posting just once a week. Which works great because I’ll be back at work and maybe raising another little one. We get the word on Tuesday whether or not we are the chosen family. So we might be very busy and I won’t even have time for daily posts. Also, I think I’m strong enough now to stick with my goal without posting daily. We shall see.

B: shredded wheat and milk, pesto eggs
S: cantalope
L: bread and cottage cheese, salad
D: assorted veggies, rice and tofu
S: lime and raspberry smoothie

I’m so happy I’m finally at 130 and that’s after this morning’s breakfast. The scale dropped from 135 yesterday to 130 this AM. I haven’t been this thin since before I got married.

Now for my next challenge. I need to stay on track while were in DC for 2 weeks and I most likely won’t be able to post while I’m there. My willpower has been so strong I’m not too worried. Even last night when we had one of my favorite dinners, pesto pasta, I used the pesto as a garnish for my swiss chard and filled up on that instead of pasta. It was very tasty and a new diet trick.

The beauty of this whole weight loss personal challenge is that I’m really seeing myself differently now. Even though I’m down to 130 I can see that I’m still far from being “dancer’s body” thin, so getting down to 120 is not just reasonable, but healthy. Before when I was sort of thin if people commented on my body I would panic and think I was too thin. But now with the BMI I know 120 is a perfectly healthy weight for me and I can just tell those people that feel the need to comment on my weight that I’m well within my healthy BMI.

We all have food issues and many are a result of how our parents dealt with food and weight. I’m one of those unfortunate people who was raised by a mother that was always pushing food. My mom would hound me if I tried to lose weight and she always seemed to despise thin, pretty women. She is obese and eats constantly. Her life revolves around food. Of course that’s her decision and I’ve never attempted to change her, but I want better for myself and my family. Although as adults we are the masters of our destiny and not our parents, I do think it’s worthwhile to take a look at how our attitudes towards weight and food are influenced by our upbringing.

B: egg, grapefruit, cantalope
L: 2 grapefruit
S: popcorn
D: pesto pasta, swiss chard

B: cereal, milk
S: mean green, granola bar
L: tortilla and beans, salad
S: mean green, cantalope
D: spinach pie, salad
S: berries

B: mean green, oatmeal and walnuts
L: tortilla and beans
S: honeydew melon
D: salad, spinach frittata

B: oatmeal, mean green
L: Subway garden burger sandwich
S: veggie salads, 5 sun chips, 2 pieces of cheese
D: necterine

I think it’s very weird how I look at pictures of myself and see how fat I was and just 50 days ago I couldn’t see it. My mind has truly been playing tricks on me and now that I’m able to see things as they really are (I am not thin) I find it hard to be patient about losing this weight.

Bought a bathing suit top today (already have lots of cute black bottoms) and tried it on. I look okay. Once I get to my goal weight I should look decent in my bathing suit. That’s pretty good, seeing as how I’ll be 5o in a couple of years.

My knee has been bugging me and it’s been difficult to keep up a decent walking pace. I hope it’s only temporary, as I love to walk every day.

Discovered a tasty and healthy “fast food” as I was out and about with the kids today. The garden burger on whole wheat and no mayo. Lots of fresh veggies and quite healthy.

By the way everone, thanks for the “cheers” and comments throughout these 49 days. This site is great for me and just knowing that I’m going to post everything I eat really helps to keep me on track.

I try to post my challenges and successes of each day in hopes of learning what works and what I need to work on.
There are some things over which we have no control and we must simply accept, such as my messed up knee. I wish I’d never had that knee surgery, but I did. So now I have to deal with it.

Well I hope the needle on the scale budges a little closer to 130 tomorrow and hopefully I can get a good workout in.