learn to do things for others..especially my wife, kids, and grandkids

i just realized that when people beat me on fb at words with friends, it makes them feel good and that s good. i need to learn to feel that way about my chess losses. i am getting there and besides i have won 920 games in a little over two years both live and on line. good for me..take care..joe

we visit my 93 yr. old father in law about 4 times a year. i have to sleep on an air mattress in this pc room. recently, i bought a 10 yr. old used toshiba laptop which runs great. i am grateful to have it cause my sister in law resented me using her pc during our visits. she had the print so small that i could barely read it and she didn t want me to make it bigger . that s how i learned she didn t want me to use her pc. she has a new wireless laptop which i can use the wireless part to fire up my laptop and thank god for these developments. overcoming boredom during these visits can be quite a challenge. i have my kindle, and my laptop now. thank god for technology.

i found a very worthwhile website..challenge.org. this site starts petitions on various causes. i signed one today to help a teacher fired for collecting money to help the treyvon martin family. the petition had 215,000 signatures on it. i can feel as if i am working on the problems i become interested in by signing various petitions. thanks..take care..joe

did i ignore my son while he was growing up ? was my mind always at school fighting with jr. high kids when he wanted my attention ? now, we see each other about 4 days over an entire year. when we are together, he barely speaks to me and rarely listens to me. i have always tried to tell him interesting stories about life,sports, books and he always half listens. he has a small window of patience for listening to me. i try to ask him questions about his life and he answers with short responses. during our recent visits, he sits there with his I pad and surfs on it. he is addicted to electronic stuff. he receives texts from friends, shops on his laptop. we aren t mad. we rarely argue. his mother was very quiet and her mother was very awkward with strangers. is his behavior towards me more a result of his genes or a result of the way i treated him while he was growing up ? this involves the old nurture nature theory. there is no answer. i have to continue to try to listen to him with interest and attention and hope our communication improves before either of us dies. take care..joe

i am getting a lesson in how to care for an old person by watching my sister in law take care of pop. pop is 93. he spent 3 nights in the hospital last week. he is home now with an oxygen tube stuck in his nose. he does nothing but eat,sleep,read the same pages over again, walk to the bathroom with help dragging his tube behind him. i didn t know they had machines to use at home which take the air out of the house and put it into the tube in your nose. i have seen people with oxygen tanks and nose tubes in restaurants and such. the home kit saves money for the oxygen tank systems are expensive. she has two smaller portable tanks for emergencies. how long will this go on ? she talks as if he will be better as soon as the latest problems clear up. i hope he dies soon so he can go to heaven and be with his wife who died 3 years ago.

we are visiting my sister in law and father in law. he is 93 and has been put on an oxygen tank. is this an artificial means to support his life ? i am praying that the poor guy dies and goes to heaven to be with his wife who died 3 years ago. he keeps coughing. he didn t recognize his daughter but he recognized me. my wife, his daughter, is a retired nurse. presently, she is telling him to cough out his flem. he isn t on his death bed yet but may soon be. is it selfish of me to wish for him to die ? i have mixed emotions about this issue.

to galactickim..i am trying to thank you for your cheers. i can t figure how to do so. i have subscribed to you in hopes that helps. the arguments my wife and i have had have been real scarey screamers. hopefully, we have this under control now. take care.

since i am a retired grandpa, my main duty is to help my children and their children. i have to go to their homes and spend time helping them. i don t like living,sleeping in other s homes but i have to do it. i don t like the way they raise their kids. i feel sorry for the kids cause i feel they are neglected. write to me with suggestions..thanks..joe

for the past 5 weeks,i have been helping my daughter who has a bi polar condition and her two kids-5,2. i feel needed and will help them for as long as they need help. this challenge is the biggest one i have faced in my 68 yrs. she will become a productive member of society again but it will take awhile. pray for us. thanks.

all the self help books say that doing for others is the best way to gain happiness for yourself. i am an only child,age 66,and have never learned to do this. i wish to work on this and give to others. my wife is expert at this. if you read my ..coping with a genius.. posts you will see how this is so. come on ,joe,me,learn to help others.
once i posted on a website,this question..who needs help.. a woman wrote to me and said..lend me $300.. i don t mean that kind of help..lol we have little money my wife and i.