try to better connect with people

I wanted to write about last night, at a thing, an event, that was the perfect opportunity to connect with several people that I really want to connect with. With one person in particular I really wanted to connect with…

Jeez…I can’t even connect with the keyboard today.

Once I was broken-up with by a guy saying I was nothing, that he looked into my eyes and saw nothing. That he didn’t know who I was or what I believed or how I felt about him. Or why he was with me, that I wasn’t enough for him.

I hadn’t thought of that for years…last night I though about it all night. I couldn’t decide if I should drink more or less, so I just went home.

This goal should really be re-prioritized as number one.

I just ran into a friend from high school at the chiropractor’s office. Since high school I’ve lived in four states. I rarely go back home. Seeing someone from there, here, should have made me go over and well…connect. At least say hi, when did you move here, blah, blah, blah.

But I didn’t. I snuck around to avoid her and out of the office. It really wasn’t that hard, she’s blind. I just spent an hour slinking around my chiropractor’s office avoiding my blind friend from high school.

Think I should add the fact that I’m going to hell as a part of the personal injury claim that landed me in the chiropractor’s office? Because really, there’s going to be some pain and suffering…IN HELL!

So maybe the goal should read “Better connect with people”, but people, they are a funny thing. Just because you want to connect, does not mean they do. Particularly the people I work with…scientists.

But I need to at least get out there and try, because it’s not something I do well, and it’s beginning to become rather obvious from my lack of people in my life. And people, I need them. Need them!

I have a nickname: 220. My grit of sandpaper, very fine but still quite abrasive. Depending on the day, it goes up or down…usually down = more abrasive. I want to change that…bump me up to 600, super fine baby!