post randomly

I took a picture of this tiny cardboard model of a computer that I made for my mom-in-law. The family is pitching in and buying her a computer, because she really needs one (she runs a business, and her old one is 16 years old!). We made the decision to get one too late for it actually to be shipped in time, so this tiny one is her Christmas present placeholder. I’m sure she’ll be a little confused when she opens it, and then happily surprised!

The picture on the “screen” is one I stole. I feel guilty, because that’s someone else’s art, an I don’t know who to attribute it to. I didn’t feel all that guilty until I decided to share a picture of the mini-computer, because now it’s online, and it’s stolen. As an artist, I would only be mad at someone stealing my work if they took credit for it and/or got paid for it, and I’m not doing either. I hope that’s sufficient.

I put a new picture up as my icon. It’s a picture I took after cutting my own bangs… something it may turn out I shouldn’t have done, because it’s very uneven, but I was tired of trying to figure out what to do with them while they were hanging in my eyes. Nothing seemed to work! I was tempted to photoshop out the dark circles under my eyes so I don’t look like I’m on drugs, but I was born that way. Haha.

My sister is buying an expensive gift for my dad and his wife this year. Her reasoning – we’ve never really done anything special for them for the holidays. I think she’s feeling that “one parent left” thing, and wanting to make the best of it.

My husband and I are contributing to the gift, which is a relief to me, because I wasn’t sure how to handle them this year. I am still angry – not so much that my dad didn’t come to my wedding, but that the way I found out he wouldn’t be there was through an email from my step-mother, the night before the wedding. Not a card, or a phone call; no congratulations; no “I’m sorry I couldn’t make it.”

I feel like I have to choose my battles, and trying to get my dad to show any signs of caring would be a waste of energy. This gift seems like begging for attention to me. I’m not saying that’s how my sister feels, but coming from me, it doesn’t seem sincere, and that makes me feel bad. I wish I didn’t have these mixed feelings.

So, the husband and I decided the whole family needed a nap, and we took the puppies into bed, and all fell asleep together. When I finally dozed off, I dreamed I was preparing a food of some sort. I don’t remember what it was – just that I was making it pretty, and squeezing some sort of condiment out over the food. Only when I woke up, I was not squeezing a bottle, but a tiny dog. Buttercup was not pleased.

but I have to complain somewhere anyway.

First of all, yes I’m aware that fast food restaurants are the devil. Having said that, I still have a burger at one a couple of times a year. I can’t eat the bread, or mayonaise – I just have the burger, cheese, and other toppings.

However! Twice my husband has stopped at Wendy’s on his way home from work, and asked what I wanted, and I ordered a bacon cheeseburger. The first time, it was this crazy three burger, triple bacon stack of meat and cheese with no lettuce, tomatoes, or anything! I ate about a third of it, and I don’t remember what happened to the rest. It was gross.

I tried to ask him, without seeming ungrateful, to not get that crazy thing next time. I want a burger with bacon and cheese, and all the regular fixin’s. A bunch of meat just doesn’t do it for me.

So, last night, my wonderful husband brought me home a bacon cheeseburger. I opened the package to see that it had bacon and cheese, and one beef patty – but nothing else! No lettuce, onions, tomatoes, or pickles! I was flabbergasted! Who eats a bacon cheeseburger with no toppings!? Apparently, that’s just how they come, unless you ask specifically for toppings, because D was eating the same thing, and had no complaints. Me, I think it’s crazy. Crazy! What’s the point of a bacon cheeseburger without any fixings? They should just come that way, with stuff on them.

:[

At least now I know.

So, I got a bunch of clothes together to give away. And the people who had called me about needing donations were supposed to pick it up off the front porch, which would have been a great plan, but I forgot to put the bag out, and now I feel like a jerk. :(

It looked like a Christmas card, but on the inside was this letter from our neighbor:

A Time to Live

We are born and from birth to teens we follow orders from our parents.

As parents we devote our time to feeding, providing clothing, housing, and teaching our children.

We labor to serve our community and save for our retirement.

In our older years, we have earned the right to retire and do what we like. Before we close our eyes for the last time we should have time to enjoy living.

We moved here to relax and enjoy life but, I think I have moved to where even simple pleasures are denied. Am I wrong? Did I?

(Letter is signed by neighbor)

Back story: One of our neighbors has a garden in her front yard that is in violation of the neighborhood ordinances that everyone who moves in agrees to when they first buy a house here. I, personally, have no problem with her garden. Some other people feel it is an eyesore that is bringing down property values. We have been receiving letters like this sporadically.

I just don’t know what to make of it. I mean, lady, I’m sorry about your garden, but it’s a gated community with set ordinances that nobody else seems to have a problem with. You knew that when you sign the same contract that every other resident in this neighborhood signed when they first moved in. If you don’t like it, do as I plan do do as soon as humanly possible: Get the hell out of this backwards place. And merry frikkin’ Christmas. :/

It’s awesome. I love it – So far, the only reaction I’ve gotten, outside of my husbands approval, was “Aw, but it was growing out so nicely.”

I like it anyway. I think it better suits my personality. :)

Some people seem to hate, or at least be leery of people who seem overly cheery.

I tend to think there is a very good chance they are, or have at some point been, dealing with some kind of crap that has taught them to persevere in a cheerful manner.

Tonight I started to wonder if that is true, or if I am just projecting my own personality onto other people. And then I wondered if that actually matters, since the end result is just me not hating people that I wouldn’t have hated anyway.

This has certainly been a moment of naval gazing, hasn’t it? I guess we all get them sometimes.

Today was my husband’s birthday, which I think I said already somewhere. Anyway, we went out with his family last night and I gave him his watch, and he LOVED it, so I was really happy.

We went to this mystery theater dinner thing with his family, and it was a five course meal. Lots of yummy stuff, and I thought I was being careful, but I got glutened. Still, the show was a lot of fun.

We were going to go to a movie today, but I was sick all day. Even after my stomach settled, I felt extremely fatigued. It’s hard to explain fatigue to a person who doesn’t get fatigued. The best I can say, I guess, is that it’s like having the flu, without the coughing and sniffling; just the puniness and extreme exhaustion.

Anyway, so it was a good day, but it was a bad day in other ways, but I am still thankful. Life is that way.

Wouldn’t it be cool if you could highlight related goals in colors!? Just like when I highlight related layers in Photoshop in the the same colors – it’s awesome!

I should put this in a suggestion box or something.