be more loving, patient and compassionate with my parents

father is kinda difficult to get ahold of!! I can’t believe how time goes by so quickly and it has been too long in between phone calls to my father.(he is not big on calling people!) I am sitting here bawling my eyes out over missing my mom and missing the fact i can’t “talk” to my dad but i so desperately want him to just hug me and tell me it will all be ok…dumb huh? Life is a big BOO BOO and i want a hug….from my mom but that is impossible ..unless i take out her blanket and wrap that around me…(i think i will do that)....i must sound like a small child..sorry i just want to get of the merry go round that is called life for a bit and just be held and who can do that the best…my mom!

to be compassionate at a very early age from my mother. She has since passed and my father is all ihave left plus my 6 of 8 siblings . My father definitely tries my patience because he is soooo self critical and is very full of pain and regret. He won’t or is afraid to reach out to his other children because of how hard he wason them growing up, i was basically a seperate family because my parents had me 8 years after my sister so my dad was a different father with me. I have to work hard at our relationship but if i don’t then i will always regret that i didn’t do more…regardless of what transpired before i was born he is still my father and i LOVE him and RESPECT him so much, i just wish he truly believed that he deserves that. He is all i have left and i just really cannot imagine my life without him ..my world needs him only he just doesnt know it deep down.