Go for daily walks with my dog.

So, Saturday the 30th of September I took Rhashida to the lake for a once around – or at least an attempt – that turned into a near nightmare of an experience.

The upside: we walked about 3/4’s of the way around the lake – the first time EVER!

The downside: yeah, I ended up almost getting assaulted or worse.

In the end – physically, I am just fine. But, I find myself dealing with a bit more anxiety & fear trying to creap in. I’m not the type to fear people. I love talking to strangers & getting to know all sorts of little somethings about their worlds. But, I goofed this time & it really coulda cost me. I had a critical error in judgment about trust & feel a bit uncomfortable with my own ability to make appropriate SAFE decisions.

I’ll get over it – but, for now – I’m hesitant.

The walk was wonderful – I’ve gone on one today with her too – that was a big step – given my anxiety. I don’t want to give fear room to grow & breed. I realize that this is how major disfunction, anxiety disorders, psychological traumas develop. The truth, though, is that we have control of how we choose to live our lives from A to Z.

I still choose to live without fear. I still choose to work towards those daily walks with my dog. Getting closer to both – with a few setbacks along the way!

... happened on Saturday 23 September 2006 – the first day of Autumn & coincidentally – or NOT – the day the bank came to pick up my car. Early in the A.M. before 7am, a county investigator came to retrieve the car for the bank (after the bankruptcy court determined that they would get the car, not me).

So, this was my first day with no vehicle. It was a relief for it to finally be over & it was devastating to lose that degree of mobility all at the same time. I decided to make the best of it. Besides giving the car back willingly, having a lovely conversation with the investigator, taking photos of the car before it went bye bye, & videotaping him towing it away… Later that day I went for a loooonnnggggg walk with my dog – in the rain no less. We walked & we ran errands. She wore her cute little yellow rain coat & we had a nice time. I survived being car-less & enjoyed the first day of Fall with my loyal companion.

... she loves me so much – but the furthest I’ve gotten on this is extending the scope of her potty outting from the boulevard in front of our building to the length of the block – it’s a short block… lol.

Plus, she’s a standard poodle & the poor gurl needs grooming – but, grooming requires money. She REALLY needs grooming & I ain’t playing… YIKES… BAD MOMMY…

I do love her though… really!!!