learn to flirt

This guy that I really like has been coming to my church for about a year now. He was really flirty but I would clam up and I think that now, even though we are still friendly, he has maybe given up on that. The low point was when we went for a walk after church back in October (there are woods behind the church). We climbed up into this treehouse and after some mindless chatter, he started out’ “I like to beat around the bush…” and I couldn’t take it. I interrupted him and said something stupid about Marvin Gaye. Someone shoot me. If I weren’t such a spaz I would know how he felt. Should I just suck it up and tell him how I feel? I am beyond learning how to flirt. Until I lose a little weight and feel like I have my life a little more under control, I am not going to have the self-esteem for any real flirting.

so a girl I knew in high school kind of set me up with her brother. We went out a few days ago to dinner. I was enjoying talking with him but noticed myself not making eye contact. Luckily I realized this was rude and then I noticed he had started doing the same thing when talking to me. I realized how annoying that can be. This goes to show you how bad I am at this. But by the end of the night, it wasn’t a problem and I think we liked each other. I still can’t seem to shake this aloofness though. I think my first step needs to be actually making eye contact with people.

with people you are actually really attracted to, at least not at the beginning. does teacher think this is good advice? my problem is, if i do flirt and it never leads anywhere i’m a bit disappointed, but then if it does i’m a bit freaked out because i’m not good at prolonged social interaction in general. i’m hesitant to date…its like even flirting is too much of a commitment. i don’t want anyone to know i have any kind of feeling like that for them. i’ve only had about one (very short) relationship in which i was the instigator in the beginning. maybe just lack of confidence.