Summarize progress monthly

Done goal by goal.

1. Happiness log – not every day, but often.
2. Acceptance and gratitude – more often. Improving.
3. Send a postcard to my daughters every week – has been super fun!
4. Walk to London – the shoe is stuck! I’m a HORRIBLE winter exerciser and I HAVE to cure that.
5. Train a hospital visitation dog – taking Cosmo in for classes now that I have caught up a bit on the bills and can afford it!
6. Complete one mini-task Tues thru Sat – going great. Really motivating.
7. SMART eating – slow improvement.
8. 43 adventure challenges with the kids – hard to do now that they are old enough to have teen ennui, but we are connecting sometimes. Loved watching “Warm Bodies” together.
9. 43 home improvement projects – stalled, but hopefully, when I get the tax refund…
10.Emergency travel fund – ditto.
11.Pay my bills on time – almost everything caught up!
12.New social activity each month – this month I started an online book club with my family, which seems to be “flopping,” but I gave it a go!
13.New restaurants – enjoying with my daughter.
14.Respond, not react – I am getting better, but always a work in progress.
15.Keep Matt’s asthma log for 30 days – in progress.
16.Treat myself better – sort of nebulous, no? Maybe I need to focus on specifics. Looking above, I can see all manner of ways in which my life has improved….
17.Keep my checkbook balanced – I’m almost ready to call this done! Using the Quicken software and not being too afraid of reality are the keys for me.
18.Establish and maintain good worknight habits – I am doing this more often, but still failing to get my son to school at the time he would like to be there. Need to continue to improve.
19.Add one item of career clothing/month: Got new tops for my primary job and also to jazz up my scrubs, which used to have to be plain.
20.Read 43 books suggested by 43T members – Currently listening to “Three Cups of Tea,” and purchased “The Places that Scare You.”
21.Deal with my mail when I get it – almost ready to cross off! Now that I am not so fearful of what may be in the mail, and am actually anticipating post cards from Postcrossing, and have an easy place to recycle the junk mail, it’s easier.
22.Own a set of 12 autographed books – no signings recently
23.Expose myself to more music – got a new CD randomly from the library – would like to get this goal knocked out!
24.Get 100 geocaches – let it lapse for the winter; time to kick it up!
25.Take a zentangle class – signed up for a “bring your Mom free” beginner’s class for Mother’s Day and we’ll see how we like it.
26.Keep the bird feeders full – yep!

New Year, time for reassessment. I have been struggling the last 6 months of 2012. Looking at goals seemed overwhelming, and the more I ignored them, the more depressed I felt, and the less I could face what I needed and truly wanted to do.

My sister and her partner visited for the Christmas break, which really helped me. Right now, I am in a place where I the folks I live with (adolescent boys) aren’t really good at positive reinforcement (although, for the sake of their future relationships, I am trying to teach them!) The folks who give me the feel-good-about-myself feelings are farther away and busy. One of my newer goals/projects is to connect with them more to help keep my spirits up.

I am going to go through my list now and update, add and delete. I am so grateful for this community, even if I’m not always “here.”

Hope everyone has a wonderful New Year!

I’ve read advocates of the “no goal, just let your life happen – goals keep you too structured and you might miss life” philosophy. More power to them if it works for them, but I have discovered that I am happier with the way my life goes when I have goals that are important and meaningful for me in a place where I can review them frequently. So I am happily back here at 43 Things.

This month has been one of transition. I have graduated, and I will now have more free time to do what I want and what needs to be done. OTOH, I have lost a handy excuse for failing to do just this!

Progress on goals:
1. Record one happy thing every day – check! Love how this helps me focus on and remember the big and small wonderful things in my life.
2. Help my daughter as she helps her BF – I wish I could do more. I got a funny movie out and we have a girls’ night planned. I also try to support her. It’s not a good situation right now :-(
3. Practice acceptance and gratitude – I really had to work on this when I did not get my boss’s job nor any call-backs on another job for which I applied. My girlfriend also graduated with her Master’s Degree when I did and is taking the next step in her career. I have committed to another year in my current job and have had a good conversation with my new boss and I will get to spend more time doing the aspects of my job that I like and less time on the parts I don’t, so it all worked out pretty well. Also, this job is very convenient to my home and has flexibility to fit well with the kids’ schedules. So even though my ego took a hit, it seems to be working out for the best right now.
4. Achieve 10 things – new goal
5. Keep a list of Ohio birds – just for fun. Making progress. I intend to go on some naturalist-led hikes to learn to distinguish some of the sparrows, finches and thrushes.
6. Deal with the mental pause that is menopause – I have decided for financial and possibly health reasons to forego hormone pellet therapy for now. I am currently using a very low-dose estrogen patch to reduce skin and vag dryness and this seems to be effective.
7. Adopt one SMART eating habit per month – no progress this month; I fell away from the previous goals. June goal will be to drink at least one cup of green tea per day. This will have the dual benefits of giving me the green tea’s health benefits and reducing my intake of black tea, in which I use cream.
8. Get the tooth fixed – appointment made for evaluation.
9. 93 miles in 93 days – 25 down, 68 to go! Go me!! Found some new fun places to walk and bought a new pair of walking shoes.
10. 43 times adventure challenge – no new entries this month. Have some baseball tix for this summer.
11. 43 home improvement projects – retitled from “redecorate my house” to make it a SMART goal. Will start this month.
12. Check balances daily in June – new goal to help me stay out of denial about my finances.
13. Create and maintain emergency travel fund – no progress. Just paying my bills is taking up all my money. Goal for starting is at the end of the summer.
14. Pay bills on time – I’m behind. I’m picking up extra hours this summer to catch up.
15. Try a new social activity – this fell off the mental map. I’ll see what I can do in June.
16. Try a new restaurant – tried several on my trip to Maine!
17. Respond, not react – oddly, this habit has stayed over the time I’ve been gone from 43T. I’m getting better.
18. Treat myself better – I am working on balancing my needs with those of the rest of the family and not always putting myself last. I also am trying to make better choices about what I eat, and exercise.
19. Keep checkbook balanced – added goal of everyday checking of balances to keep me in line. My finances (and checkbooks) had gotten really out of hand.
20. Add one item of career clothing per month – I got talked into hosting a jewelry party. I ended up with several pieces of higher-quality costume jewelry for a very minimal amount. I’m counting this ;-)
21. Read 43 books suggested by 43T members – new book in process, new recommendations added.
22. Deal with my mail when I get it – I also haven’t been doing this, since that would involve knowing what’s going on with my bills(!) Now that I am committed to looking my finances squarely in the eye, so to speak, doing this is easier.
23. Own 12 autographed books – haven’t had a chance to add to my collection in a while.
24. Expose myself to more music, and more diverse music – will be updating this into a SMART goal this month
25. Get 100 geocaches – now that weather is better, I intend to add to the total!
26. Keep bird feeders full – check
27. Investigate jobs with books – I was actually accepted into the Kent State University Library Sciences Masters Program. With my MSN, I can get a job an academic librarian. I am still gathering data on whether the effort is worth the payoff.

Completed goals: Complete my MSN, try Turkish Delight, and own as string of pearls.

Glad to be back!

1. Find at least one thing each day that makes me happy and record it everyday for a year.

It seems like when I am making (or trying to make) big changes on the inside, I go away and “hide” for a while. I don’t know why I do that – I guess it’s fear. Just when I can use the support most, I disappear. Must be that I am not ready to officially face whatever it is I am dealing with. So I was “gone” for a while, but am so happy to be back.

2. New hair, new glasses, new lipstick
The lipstick reappeared! Yay! Saved me $30!
I am giving up on the time frame for this goal. I posted a picture of myself in my old glasses and the Internet didn’t come to a grinding stop LOL. Will get the glasses after the first of the year, when I have my new flexible spending account $$. Too many people trying to use up 2010 mone to find sales.

3. Make amends
Considering this done, for now. Wrote a letter to my oldest, working on being open and supportive to one of my other daughters with whom there had been tension, working on being appropriately socially polite (while maintaining boundaries) with my ex.

4. Share in Holiday Card exchange
Done! Enjoyed this immmensely!

5. Make Whole Life Changes Using ‘Tolerable 10s’
Will make a more conscious effort to set aside time in 10-minute blocks to see if this works well for me.

6. Deal with the mental pause that is menopause
Ongoing…

7. Adopt one SMART healthy eating habit per month for one year
Have at least on serving of vegetables at lunch 6 days a week – Keeping this goal for another month until it becomes more of a habit.

8. “43-times adventure challenge” with kids
Have been focusing on the older kids and new grandkids these last two months. Will focus on activities for the younger ones again in January.

9. create and maintain an emergency travel fund
Had to dip into for Christmas. OTOH, was able to travel at Thanksgiving without breaking the bank. Reserve not yet where I want it to be, though.

10. Get baby books and CDs for granddaughters
With modern technology and two hyperattentive cameraphilic dads, these two are the most well-documented kids in history. I am giving up on this goal in favor of another way to show my affection for them. Actually, I sorta did this in that my mom and I recorded two Hallmark books and sent them for Christmas.

11. Seven a week: 3 aerobic, 2 strength, 2 flexibility
Oy, off the wagon. Gotta get cracking!

12. pay my bills on time
Closer to full automation.

13. Try a new social activity each month
Out in November to my new church for a brass band concert.

14. try a new restaurant every month
Out with the girls to a great little tea room in Phoenix the day before Thanksgiving. Nothing new in December :-(

15. respond not react
An ongoing process. Keeping it on the list to remind me.

16. treat myself better
Progress.

17. keep my checkbook balanced
Doing better.

18. Add one item of career clothing to wardrobe per month
Again, this fell by the wayside whilst I was spending $ on Christmas. Have to do it though…my stuff is getting shabby!

19. expose myself to more music, and more diverse music
Brass band concert. And I’m going to try to listen to the CD my one son bought for the other for Christmas. And I got a new Josh Groban Christmas CD, which was new to be, but admittedly not too far out of my comfort zone.

20. Read 43 books suggested by 43T members
Continuing “Finding Serenity in the Age of Anxiety” and trying to introduce the strategies into my life. Have “28 stories of AIDS in Africa” out to read next/concurrently.

21. deal with my mail when I get it
Progress in both snail and e-mail. Almost ready to call this one done!

22. Own a set of 12 books autographed by authors I admire
Got “Book Lust” by Nancy Perl from my daughter for Christmas!

23. Keep the bird feeders full
Yep! Enjoying the feathered company.

1. Find at least one thing each day that makes me happy and record it everyday for a year.
Lots of good stuff this month!

2. New hair, new glasses, new lipstick
Lost the dang lipstick and will have to repurchase. Will be getting glasses soon, but need to defer for now.

3. Achieve 10 things that nag & eat away at me so I can be free of them & feel smugly pleased instead – Round 3!
Done! Replaced with participate in 43T card exchange. :-)

4. make amends
In progress.

5. Make Whole Life Changes Using ‘Tolerable 10s’
Slid away from. Have to get back to it.

6. Deal with the mental pause that is menopause
Had to make an appt. with the doc in Phoenix. No one with her philosophy here in the Cleveland area. Will get redosed with the pelleted hormone replacements just before Thanksgiving.

7. Adopt one SMART healthy eating habit per month for one year
Have at least on serving of vegetables at lunch 6 days a week – Epic fail due to lack of organization. Will give it another shot this month.

8. “43-times adventure challenge” with kids
A Breakfast in the Park and a theater experience with the youngest two.

9. create and maintain an emergency travel fund
On track.

10. Get baby books and CDs for granddaughters
Found a real nice online baby book – will change the focus of this goal slightly. My new goal will be to have a book that records their first year that I can have printed and sent to them after their first birthday.

11. Seven a week: 3 aerobic, 2 strength, 2 flexibility
Not to goal level, but continuing to exercise. Started Zumba class this month.

12. pay my bills on time
Got some additional bills automated.

13. Try a new social activity each month
Meeting at the Brecksville Public Library to discuss new mystery authors.

14. try a new restaurant every month
Didn’t get this done this month.

15. respond not react
Progressively better; not quite there yet.

16. treat myself better
Progress, but not quite there yet on this goal either.

17. keep my checkbook balanced
Doing better.

18. Add one item of career clothing to wardrobe per month
Bought a nice light sweater on clearance! ($42—> $18 whoo-hoo!)

19. expose myself to more music, and more diverse music
Got a CD out of the library that was absolutely awful lol But trying it was true to the goal!

20. Read 43 books suggested by 43T members
Currently continuing “Finding Serenity in the Age of Anxiety”. It’s not a book you can just read cover to cover – you have to take breaks and digest it. I’m really getting a lot out of it.

21. deal with my mail when I get it
Progress in both snail and e-mail. Helps to be involved in Postcrossing – gives me something besides bills to find in the box!

22. get 100 geocachesGPS on the fritz. Put this goal on hold for a while.

23. Own a set of 12 books autographed by authors I admire
Found a web site that sends me a weekly list of author visits in my area.

Put “Keep the bird feeders full” back above the accountability line. Getting to the season where it’s a must.

1. Find at least one thing each day that makes me happy and record it everyday for a year.

Several entries, not documenting every day, but I’m recognizing and appreciating happiness in my everyday life.

2. New hair, new glasses, new lipstick

Hair and lipstick done, eye appointment made!

3. Achieve 10 things that nag & eat away at me so I can be free of them & feel smugly pleased instead – Round 3!

Did round 2 this month too, making progress on a new set of tasks.

4. make amends

Know what I want to do now; just have to do it.

5. Make Whole Life Changes Using ‘Tolerable 10s’

Working well! Getting the anxiety-producing tasks done in bits.

6. Deal with the mental pause that is menopause

Having a real hard time finding a doctor in Cleveland. Working on getting a prescription to tide me over until I can get to Phoenix again.

7. Adopt one SMART healthy eating habit per month for one year

Added “eat yogurt” this month, and did a pretty good job of it. Next month: Have at least on serving of vegetables at lunch 6 days a week.

8. “43-times adventure challenge” with kids

A 3D movie with the younger kids; a trip to Boston with my oldest son.

9. create and maintain an emergency travel fund

On track.

10. Get baby books and CDs for granddaughters

Setting up online for Lydia!

11. Seven a week: 3 aerobic, 2 strength, 2 flexibility

Recommitted to this goal. Got 5 in this week!

12. pay my bills on time

More bills automated!

13. Try a new social activity each month

Book signing in Boston!

14. try a new restaurant every month

Sam’s Cafe (Cheers) at Quincy Market in Boston

15. respond not react

Been catching myself earlier and overall doing better!

16. treat myself better

I was able to identify that I wanted to go to Boston, prioritize my life so that I could, and make it happen. Still riding the high!

17. keep my checkbook balanced

Progress! Got Quicken and have been keeping up. Just have to finish getting one checking account electronically hooked in.

18. Add one item of career clothing to wardrobe per month

Bought two satin-trimmed T-shirts on clearance!

19. expose myself to more music, and more diverse music

Have to get out of my rut.

20. Read 43 books suggested by 43T members

Enjoyed the Mistborn trilogy and Michael J. Fox’s “Always Looking Up.” Working on “Finding Serenity in the Age of Anxiety” and enjoying it.

21. deal with my mail when I get it

Progress. Still hate to go to the box and confront the bills.

22. get 100 geocaches

One more down; 57 total.

23. Own a set of 12 books autographed by authors I admire

Up to 5!

Completed “Get my Passport” and “Go on a whale watch”!

Overall, a very good month!

Passport – Paperwork submitted! Yay! Just waiting for it to arrive.

Tolerable 10’s – new goal, working out nicely. I can commit to 10 minute bursts of exercise and money management!

Menopause – hormone level came back lower than desired and seems to be dropping further due to my body is absorbing them quickly. I was a little disappointed that the doctor my daughter worked with was not more proactive in finding a provider back in my hometown, but I think I’ve found someone and have contacted their office.

Smart health habit – taking off water drinking, adding yogurt eating.

43 times adventure challenge with kids – Slow this month due to getting back to school. Will be looking at something for this weekend now that we are more settled into the school year routine.

Emergency travel fund – opened a new savings account into which $100 will be directly deposited each month. I have a $200 Continental gift certificate from the kids, so when this account reaches $300, I’ll consider this goal done. (Costs a little over $400 round trip to either LA or Phoenix from Cleveland or Akron.)

Complete Evaluation class – half a paper to go! Yay!

Get baby books and CDs for granddaughters – found an online site and am making my granddaughter a book. Will start one for new baby when she arrives, too!

Seven a week – not quite getting there, more like 3 or 4. But I’m keeping this goal as-is because this is where I want to get.

Pay my bills on time – opened a new checking account which I am limiting to recurring bills only. All discretionary funds will remain in my current account. Hoping that separating the two will keep things clearer and timelier. Will consider this done when all bills current and automated.

New social activity & new restaurant – had a really fun outing to a concert and meal with my best friend for my birthday.

Respond not react – so-so progress. Had a big lapse, but it was internal only, so that’s progress, right?

Treat myself better – I have been working Saturday and Sunday every weekend when the kids are with their dad. I am rearranging my schedule so that I can have Sunday off by myself every other weekend to recharge/go to church, etc.

Keep my checkbook balanced – not there yet but getting closer now that I have the new account.

Career clothing – not done, desperately needed! No extra $ cuz spent on kids (at least that’s my excuse since I hate clothes shopping :-P

More diverse music – yep

43 books – Really enjoyed book one of The Mistborn Trilogy by Brian Sanderson. Also got a few new suggestions!

Deal with my mail – mostly keeping up!

Get 100 geocaches – added to the list!

Own a set of 12 books autographed – Set to travel to Boston to get two this month. REALLY looking forward to it!!

Get a passport – have money now, filling out paperwork!

Menopause – had hormone therapy, appears to be improving my overall mood, energy level and body shape (YES!) following up with lab work. Had my 50th birthday and got over that hurdle.

SMART eating – still haven’t fully gotten into the habit of water before tea/cola. Have to keep this on the list.

Emergency travel fund – partly subsidized by kids who sent me a Continental gift certificate for my birthday! The balance will soon accrue as I work on my bills.

Complete evaluation class: First paper done, got 100%! I think the instructor read more into it than I actually wrote, but I’ll take it! Second assignment looks straightforward and I’ll try to knock it out quickly.

Seven a week continues to be a lofty goal, but I am getting 2-4 per week, which is an overall improvement for me.

New social activity – need to get out with grown-ups! My friend and I are going out for a belated birthday celebration at The Harp, which is an Irish pub in Lakewood, Ohio (see picture – doesn’t it look great?)

Teeth/inhaler – calling it done.

Geocaching – added one.

Pay bills on time – starting new checking account with 2nd job $. Think separating the monthly bills from discretionary spending account and automating them will help a lot.

Keep checkbook balanced – continue to fall down on this one due to fear. Hope to see improvement this month. Likewise, with the mail – don’t want to face the bills. Will straighten my spine and tackle it.

Update wardrobe – need to make this a SMART goal. I will reframe it as “Add one item of career clothing to wardrobe per month.”

Expose myself to music – got a CD of Mozart which I enjoyed.

Read 43 books recommended by 43T-ers – Finished Mr Posterior & The Genius Child – recommended by beachbum12b – and liked it a lot. Just got Brandon Sanderson’s first book from The Mistborn Trilogy, recommended by truthsayer226. I think my son might enjoy this one, too.

Added some new goals: 43 things adventure challenge with the kids with two completed, and get baby books for granddaughters, in process. Completed plan for birthday.

I have been away for a while because I was in a shame spiral – couldn’t face what I wasn’t doing, couldn’t admit to myself…On one hand, I was productive in some areas such as in getting the huge paper done for class…but in other areas, I couldn’t keep the plates spinning and they broke.

But today is a new day, a new month, the start of the rest of my life as the old cliche goes. So my overarching goal for this month will be to be present, to accept where I am so I can deal with what I need to deal with and grow, and to be patient with myself and remember that these items are “goals” that I am working toward and not a set of laws to judge myself by.

If I remember “Progress, not perfection” I’ll probably be kinder to myself and therefore more successful and happier in the long run.