Stop drinking so much

one night in the past 2 weeks sober. hurray for me….

Failing at this..

life got real hard real fast…

its drink or start cutting again…

I’m trying real hard not to create anymore scars.

This seems to come and go with me. I want to cut it out completely because I think its hell on my body. I’m getting really out of shape. But some days I just can’t believe the crap I’ve dealt with at work and I need something to help me relax before I go to bed and It takes a few before I can sleep.

This isn’t going to good for me. Finished another bottle of Jager tonight. I can make it a few days without a drink and then I just have to have one…

I can’t sleep at night if I don’t have a few drinks. I think I’m at about 4-6 a night, not enough to get drunk, just to keep the buzz going.

I think part of it is the stress from the work I do, part of it is to numb myself from the loneliness I feel.

At this point its harder to remember the nights I don’t drink than it is the ones that I do.