stop worrying and stop stressing.

and not worry about anything! i’m going to focus on what i’ve got and what i know…not what i don’t know or dont’ have!! i figure it’ll help!! i can’t know everything, i can’t control anything, i can’t make things happen!

and not worry about anything! i’m going to focus on what i’ve got and what i know…not what i don’t know or dont’ have!! i figure it’ll help!! i can’t know everything, i can’t control anything, i can’t make things happen!

i think my main issue is that i try and guess what’s going to happen so that i can prepare myself. that means that i’m doing now and thinking about what’s to come. its no wonder i’m tired! i need to just be in the moment a bit more! i can’t even identify when i’m worrying or stressing yet. i wonder how to do that.

this is tough because i’m a worrier and i stress out a lot but i know that i can make this part of my life. the main task for this week is to not worry about ian. i’m going to focus on our talk and making sure that things are getting better not worse. i need to open up to him but not expect immediate results

i am trying not to stress about things that i can’t control and worrying about what will come of other things but at the end of the day i’m not sure if i’m doing a good job with that. i’m feeling a bit stressed right now about money but i’m also trying to find ways to deal with it. i think i’ve come to the conclusion that i only stress about things when i’m not being proactive. this is why setting goals really helps!

last night we had a long talk about us and now i feel like i need to keep track of how i’m doing. i need to focus on making myself a complex woman again with interests. i know i’m seeing him tomorrow and friday. asking him if he wants me to come over tonight isn’t fair to him because he feels obligated to say yes. i know that i’ve done that and i’ll text him and say i’m sorry. he called me right on time tonight and we had a bit of a chat which was good. he’s doing his thing, i’m doing mine! baby steps is what i’m working towards! my goal for tomorrow is to be light and fun without making him feel like i need more than i’m getting.

but i’m still really upset that he’s not finding time to at least communicate with me. we just chatted on the phone and i’m hoping that things will get better if he has a chance to chat tomorrow night.

i found a therapist today and i’m so excited! she’s smart and young and i get a great vibe from her. i feel like she’s one of my friends already and can’t wait to start delving into some real issues. today we just did the initial consult and already i feel myself opening up and being truthful about things. i feel calm and more balanced. add to that the fact that i go out to the gym even when i didn’t want to and saw a movie with natasha. i wasn’t clingy to ian and didn’t really care that he’s out with his friends…which is how it shoudl be!! i’ve got a second appointment on monday morning!

i was able to do some writing before bed last night about my strengths and that made some of my negative thoughts less ‘noteworthy’. its a start i guess!

also got the feeling that the girls from my group aren’t really into me but i was able to come back to the basic concept that i’m a good person and if they don’t like me, its because they don’t know/understand me.

i am tired of stressing about the little things and worrying about what may come! i try and just focus on the here and now but its hard!