find true love

Is it wrong for me to believe in true love. My friends tell me that I get bored to easily. Well Im so not up for just settling with anyone. All the expectations are ridiculous but I guess we have to have em. Right? They say I’m running. Maybe so. I tell you what you have to have balls to be with me because I change as if the world was ending tomorrow. Bipolar? Hmm whatever. I want to be happy and sometimes being by myself suits me just fine. Dating to me actually sucks because its exhausting and I really dont like hurting anyones feelings if its just not working out. All this feeling stuff is annoying sometimes you know. I’m usually upfront in the beginning as a matter of fact all the time. Then somehow I have invisible handcuffs on. Talk about running scared. If I did that to a guy he’d take flight? What the hell is going on?
So now Im almost scared to let anyone really get to know me. Then last night I sat back and thought about what I had to offer besides being a great person that treats people equally and I free spirited and creative. So I thought since I only have a high school education should I settle for less or will they think less of me because I havent pursued further education and my ambition to live is based on being happy. I like so many things and I’m so open minded that I cant seem to go in one direction and I’m not really interested in anything monotonous. Yes I want all the american dreams but at what cost? What is more important? Money, House, Car those material things are never guaranteed anyhow and neither is love. So we should just be alright with the experience and let go. Things tend to be one-sided alot either on their part or mine. Maybe if people thought about being friends more instead of being on the hunt or prowl. I hate not knowing what ones intentions are. some are still interested in playing games and getting what they want before casting their fishing line out again. You’d believe in your thirties that people have settled a bit more, but boy is that a crock of crap. But as always I wish peace happiness, harmony and love for those who do find it.