phronima in Sydney is doing 42 things including…

Allow myself to only be treated well by the people I choose to have friendships and relationships with. If they do not, I need to find the courage to move on without them.

56 cheers |

phronima has written 8 entries about this goal

Poohey  — 1 year ago

Latest incident involves a so-called friend that uses up her own money for what she calls her ‘lifestyle’ had hardly has money for her daily lunches and dinners. I can lend her money that’s fine but she insists that i eat with her too. Fine. When the time comes for tally up the how much she owes me she keeps complaining about me ‘over charging’

This riles me up BIG TIME because
a) I don’t overcharge – if anything I UNDERCHARGE
b) She doesn’t trust me
c) I feel used
d) I have been unjustly accused of this by others before
e) Oh and she is 32, has a full time job, AND can do maths!

Now, you must think I am a cheapskate. Well I am when it comes to people I don’t give a shit about.

Case in point: I took my REAL friend to this nice place and bought her dinner, just because I haven’t seen her in a year and I know she is out of work at the moment

I feel this friendship with ‘friend’ is based on my usefulness and as such am getting quite bored. The conversations are usually assinine when its not revolving around her and i am bored of the empty compliments used to get her way.

And, funnily enough, those have accused me in the past of money pinching are usually cheapskates themselves! I bought them presents and never got even a birthday wish out of them

I am going to tell her to stop asking me for money because it’s starting to irritate me, or else don’t bother being my ‘friend’ – there’s plenty ‘friends’ lining up to ‘use’ me

Jul 07, 2007, 03:26AM PDT | 1 comment

These people..  — 1 year ago

now include family members

Jan 03, 2007, 05:27AM PST 1 cheer | 1 comment

Sigh of relief  — 2 years ago

Been taking a break from T
Sometimes I feel guilty about not being there for her as friend, but at the same time I know my needs in this friendship will never be met if all I do is give and listen to her talk about herself, at me, all day long.

Just got to be strong and brave – cut my losses and move on!

Jun 05, 2006, 07:31AM PDT 1 cheer | 2 comments

Getting close..  — 2 years ago

I am sick of someone who claims to be my friend but never really is around to be a friend, emotionally or geographically. This is bullshit. I am moving on.

Apr 28, 2006, 10:11AM PDT 3 cheers | 4 comments

This is not easy for me.  — 2 years ago

I tend to give those I am fond of too much power.. I get into a habit of trying to make them happy, so much so that I forget about my right to happiness..

What I do find helps is a little bit of distance. It puts me in perspective and gives me more head space to work out what I have compromised in trying to make others happy.

Apr 13, 2006, 08:59AM PDT 1 cheer | 0 comments

And I did it, again  — 2 years ago

Well, it was hard. The decision was made and executed very swiftly so the shock factor was high. It took me an entire week just to accept the fact that I will not be having connections/relationships with these people anymore – but life goes on and the future can only be brighter! (unless one wills against that thought..)

Mar 26, 2006, 06:58AM PST | 0 comments

done  — 2 years ago

I had mistakenly believed a particular person to be a friend, turned out said person has been rude to me on several occasions so three strikes and they’re out..

Nov 24, 2005, 06:01PM PST 2 cheers | 3 comments

Are bad connection better than no connections?  — 3 years ago

I tend to hang on to these “soul-sulking” people wondering if there is any redeeming qualities that I have missed out by being too “judgemental”. In the long run though I think its best to severe the connection because their bad habits invariably rub off on me.

Having said that however I’m tring to reconnect with some people, but this time with my eyes wide open

May 13, 2005, 01:36AM PDT 2 cheers | 1 comment

phronima has gotten 56 cheers on this goal.

 

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