I think Im on a path of finding balance.
The challenges of recent months,
suffering the loss of Brian and the chaos
of domestic life at home have been hard
and desperatly dark.
However, whilst Ive had my days of bleakness,
apathy and depression have not closed me down.
Im finding myself having the ‘tools’ to stir, recognise and move forward.
I am taking my own advise, being in the moment
and making time to help myself heal.
This in itself is a huge step forward for me.
I have always found helping, supporting others
much easier than doing it for myself.
I now have empathy for myself.
It feels good.
still doing well : )
Im having to deal with some difficult situations, but Im staying kind of on an even keel. Im being easier on myself than I have before, not ignoreing my own advice and Ive also not tryed to ‘fix’ a lot of “stuff”. Its been refreshing to have my boundary’s more marked out.
I hav’nt experienced any negative responses, I feel much more in control of what I can do emotionally.
I have upped my fitness routine & been looking at diet in relation to depression & stress. Its really been a huge help.
Long may this continue : )
Since having trouble even putting this down as a goal, Ive still been well. I think in a warped way, I thought having it as a goal I may jinx myself, back into a downward slope.
I know thats nuts but I was so scared of going back to that ‘place’ I didnt want to chance it !
I realise Ive taken more control recently,the pills have helped, but Im exercising a lot more & learning to say no more, to people who ask too much of me.Its very difficult & I get really down & feel guilty but eventually Ill get some balance.
This is hard.
Its taken almost a month of being on 43T to even put this as a goal. I have to acknowledge this.
If its on my list Im open to its reality every time I log on, I know that sounds lame, but I wanted to keep positive with most of my goals & this one is so scary.
Im unsure whether beating it is the right goal for me, I think living well with it would be OK for a start.
Ive suffered with this now for a long, long time.
Ill write more when Im feeling less vulnerable.